Back from my travels, 3 weeks out of the office coinciding with the 3 coldest Chicago weeks of the winter. Nice.
I was in Florida for the Superbowl (not the match, just in a bar with some mates from the UK). See below for more. The City went pretty mad for it but they were always unlikely winners if we're honest.
I was then on Miami's South Beach working. Yes, I know life of a rock star. Then I went on holiday straight from Miami to South America. Argentina's Buenos Aries first then Uruguay.
The Argies think that they are European and very friendly they are too. Don't mention the war though - said it once, but think I got away with it. Whereas Uruguay is a bit of a throw back to days gone by. More on Uruguay here.
The highlight, apart from looking at the birds - I did enquire into Brazilians, but got blank looks - was the Tango, honestly that is right good and going to a River Plate match. More here on that.
But back now, suntanned, with my own Brazilian and ready to rock and roll and catch up on the N&R FL league. Week 24 below. 25 and 26 on there way plus all the other stuff like the Team Challenge and some more moans about Americans, of course.
Nobs
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Philly cheese steak
Breaking News 88888 Manager of week 24Philly based John Littig blew everyone away in week 24 notching 59 points, 23 better than the next best score, which was from Panzo's Panthers.
Rooney & Ronaldo's rockstars now head a very tight looking Premiership table after being in 7th last week. Brighton Blues kept up their father and son challenge and are upto 8th after a 34 point week. Pete Doherty for Allianz continued their good run with 33 points. Two teams scored 31 - Ping Pong and Thieving Chelsea gits, moving Rob away from the bottom of The Premiership.
The worst score back in week 24 was by Here we go again. Just 3 points, the 4th worst of the season.
Littig Rocks
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Premiership - week 24 scores
You have already heard that Littig's Rockstars top the table, taking over from Shavchenko's Spurs. Flighty Feet daintily drop to 3rd while 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th remain the same.
Outside the top 7 we have Brighton Blues poised nicely in 8th. That well known genius Christian Dailly is heading the wrong way and now overtaken by Lovejoys Luvvies going in the right direction.
At the bottom Thieving Chelsea gits climb a couple of places on the back of a good week. The bottom 3 remain unchanged.
You have already heard that Littig's Rockstars top the table, taking over from Shavchenko's Spurs. Flighty Feet daintily drop to 3rd while 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th remain the same.
Outside the top 7 we have Brighton Blues poised nicely in 8th. That well known genius Christian Dailly is heading the wrong way and now overtaken by Lovejoys Luvvies going in the right direction.
At the bottom Thieving Chelsea gits climb a couple of places on the back of a good week. The bottom 3 remain unchanged.
Francey and Suzie rack them up.
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Championship - week 24 scores
Not much change at the top of The Championship. Shay's Jonny Forskins and the Phullbacks lead is cut back to 13 by Sven and Janas - Bye. The biggest rack belonged to Suzie, who climbed over 3 blokes to get to 6th after a good week. Ping Pong dragged Francey's Vote Seagulls Party with her, as the spreadsheet finally shows some dividends after a jump of 6 places.
Bollocks to Ballack and Athletico Abertawe drop out of the top 8. Behind them North of Crystal Palarse rallied themselves into 17th.
At the arse end of the business Le Guen's Revolution, about as current as Sweaty's first ever girlfriend's bathroom remain adrift. Panzo's Panthers stay in 25th despite a fine week.
Not much change at the top of The Championship. Shay's Jonny Forskins and the Phullbacks lead is cut back to 13 by Sven and Janas - Bye. The biggest rack belonged to Suzie, who climbed over 3 blokes to get to 6th after a good week. Ping Pong dragged Francey's Vote Seagulls Party with her, as the spreadsheet finally shows some dividends after a jump of 6 places.
Bollocks to Ballack and Athletico Abertawe drop out of the top 8. Behind them North of Crystal Palarse rallied themselves into 17th.
At the arse end of the business Le Guen's Revolution, about as current as Sweaty's first ever girlfriend's bathroom remain adrift. Panzo's Panthers stay in 25th despite a fine week.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Road to Wembley - Horns burst bubbles
So West Ham blew it, Curb's old Cupitis getting the better of the Hammers as Watford become our team of choice on The Road to Wembley (if it's ready).It could have been so different if Bobby Zamora's had scored instead of hitting the bar after a minute but West Ham never got any closer. ANTHONY McNAMEE broke the deadlock with a 42nd-minute overhead kick after goalkeeper Roy Carroll's cock up, he was probably holding a bottle of Stella at the time!
The Hornets had to come through a second-half onslaught, with their brave display summed up by Jordan Stewart's late header off the line. West Ham also had £1m a week Lucus 'I came here to win things' Neill carried off.
West Ham team: Carroll, Neill (Pantsil 48), Spector, Dailly, McCartney, Newton (Sheringham 65), Reo-Coker, Quashie, Boa Morte (Etherington 77), Zamora, Cole.
Subs Not Used: Green, Mullins.
Attendance: 31,168
MoM: No one.
Watford play Ipswich in the next round.
Monday, February 05, 2007
A sad night for the windy city as pre-game favourites Indianapolis colts rolled over Chicago Bears in last night's Superbowl XLI. Despite early euphoria when Devin Hester caught the Colts opening kick-off and raced 92 yards down the field for a touchdown to give Bears a dream start, the Colts offensive pressure finally told in the 2nd half, although despite showing minimal offensive threat after the first quarter, Chicago were still in the game right up until the last 11 or 12 minutes.Down by just two at the half, the Bears could not get their offensive plays working. The pouring rain only helped add to mistakes that littered the game from both sides but crucially Rex Grossman, the young Bears quarterback made a couple of decisive errors in front a watching audience of 93m people to give the Colts a 29-17 victory.
Back in a bar in St Petersburg, retired Indiana residents outnumbered people wearing orange and blue and come the end of a long day I was happier to be in Florida and not in the cold, silent and sad streets of Chicago.
Photo: Chicago linebacker Brian Urlacher trudges off the Superbowl field after Bears lose to Colts.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Go Bears!
Well it's Superbowl day, a close 2nd to Thanksgiving in terms of importance in most American households. The television companies dictate that the game will kick off at 6.24pm but the build up started a couple of weeks back and has reached frenzied point in the windy city.I'm in Florida and the orange and blue shirts far outnumber the white and blue of the Indianapolis Colts, a team of nomadic history in a city of just 790,000 people with a roundabout as it's cultural highlight!
Many times since my arrival in Chicago I have compared it's sports teams fortunes to those of Charlton. The Bears one of the two original NFL teams, have created a legacy in the game but equally compassion seems to be limited to those within the city walls.
Every neutral seems to be backing the Colts today, mainly because of the countries fondness for Peyton Manning, its 'legendary' but trophy-less quarterback with a famous family whereas the Bears novice but erratic young quarterback Rex Grossman just sparks condemnation from the media.
I've always loved an underdog and the Bears go into today's game with all and sundry expecting them to get well beaten, well about 3 million people in their homes and in it's bars in -23C temperatures back in Chicago expects differently as will those wearing orange and blue in Miami's Dolphin Stadium later, who will far outnumber their rival supporters.
No one gives them a chance but the city expects. Go Bears!
Photo above of one of lions outside Chicago's Art Institute
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
My kinda town
You know how every American wants to be a Brit and birds just want to wake up to an English accent?
Well, look at this new invention. Stephen Fry will wake you up personally, okay perhaps not every girls dream, but he will sooth you whilst you awake from your slumber with 50 programmed deeply fortifying messages. The clock provides gentle messages such as "good morning, your horoscope is promising very considerable profit with equal quantities of pleasure. Unlikely as this may currently appear, the world merely requires your presence for the process to begin."
Wonderful, better than an elbow in the back any day.
Well, look at this new invention. Stephen Fry will wake you up personally, okay perhaps not every girls dream, but he will sooth you whilst you awake from your slumber with 50 programmed deeply fortifying messages. The clock provides gentle messages such as "good morning, your horoscope is promising very considerable profit with equal quantities of pleasure. Unlikely as this may currently appear, the world merely requires your presence for the process to begin."
Wonderful, better than an elbow in the back any day.
Another five to feed Doherty’s habit
Breaking News 88888 Manager of week 23
For the 2nd week running a Championship manager picks up the MoW award. Simon Jenkins’ Pete Doherty for Allianz continued their good 2007 form by hitting 57 points and picking up a fiver and moves into the promotion places for the first time.
Lovejoy was next up with 52 points, why Philly cheese steak John Littig saw his Rockstars smack 49 to retain his place in the top 7.
The Underwriting cop tried to arrest his slide with 47 and Goonersmoan storm into 6th with 41.
Back in The Championship Huw’s Athletico Abertawe are also on a role, the Welshman scoring 38, four more than Incontentia B uttocks, Rose’s Rovers and Californication.
Other fine weeks were had by Premiership table-toppers Savchenko Spurs and the in-form Living in Sin.
The week’s lowest score was 10 points and rather surprisingly wasn’t by Sweaty but Pete Doyle’s Racing Ginger.
For the 2nd week running a Championship manager picks up the MoW award. Simon Jenkins’ Pete Doherty for Allianz continued their good 2007 form by hitting 57 points and picking up a fiver and moves into the promotion places for the first time.
Lovejoy was next up with 52 points, why Philly cheese steak John Littig saw his Rockstars smack 49 to retain his place in the top 7.
The Underwriting cop tried to arrest his slide with 47 and Goonersmoan storm into 6th with 41.
Back in The Championship Huw’s Athletico Abertawe are also on a role, the Welshman scoring 38, four more than Incontentia B uttocks, Rose’s Rovers and Californication.
Other fine weeks were had by Premiership table-toppers Savchenko Spurs and the in-form Living in Sin.
The week’s lowest score was 10 points and rather surprisingly wasn’t by Sweaty but Pete Doyle’s Racing Ginger.
Feel the Lovejoy
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Premiership - week 23 scores
If teams don’t watch out Savchenko Spurs will start to look unassailable at the top of The Premiership. Ryan Is 27 points ahead of Flighty Feet, who move into 2nd, whilst Cristiano’s allstars slip to 3rd.
Although Ryan’s form in the first half of the season has been title inspiring, I have my beady eyes on the Flighty Feet ladies, who have impressed N&R since their prize winning performance at the end of last season.
New into the top 7 is Goonersmoan and Rooney & Ronaldo’s Rockstars return after dropping out last week.
Christian Dailly Genius fall 3 places and #1 Strugglers, fall to 10th. It is Davor’s last week in our group at work, and I would like to thank him for all of his hard work, but I couldn’t possibly. Seriously Davor, keep in touch and no hiding when England hammer Croatia in the return!
The Premiership table is extremely tight top to bottom and Lovejoy’s luvvies proved how tight it is after jumping from 19th to 11th after scoring 52 points in week 23.
At the bottom, East Indian Summer falls into the drop zone replacing Lovejoy. I Still *ing Hate Chelsea stay bottom, 44 points from safety.
If teams don’t watch out Savchenko Spurs will start to look unassailable at the top of The Premiership. Ryan Is 27 points ahead of Flighty Feet, who move into 2nd, whilst Cristiano’s allstars slip to 3rd.
Although Ryan’s form in the first half of the season has been title inspiring, I have my beady eyes on the Flighty Feet ladies, who have impressed N&R since their prize winning performance at the end of last season.
New into the top 7 is Goonersmoan and Rooney & Ronaldo’s Rockstars return after dropping out last week.
Christian Dailly Genius fall 3 places and #1 Strugglers, fall to 10th. It is Davor’s last week in our group at work, and I would like to thank him for all of his hard work, but I couldn’t possibly. Seriously Davor, keep in touch and no hiding when England hammer Croatia in the return!
The Premiership table is extremely tight top to bottom and Lovejoy’s luvvies proved how tight it is after jumping from 19th to 11th after scoring 52 points in week 23.
At the bottom, East Indian Summer falls into the drop zone replacing Lovejoy. I Still *ing Hate Chelsea stay bottom, 44 points from safety.
Jonny gives it some skin
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Championship - week 23 scores
32 points was enough for Shay’s Jonny Forskins to take over at the top of The Championship pushing Sven & Janas back into 2nd. Thank you 4 the daze and Rose’s Rovers remain 4th and 5th.
New into 5th is W23 MoW Pete Doherty for Allianz and into 6th climbs Lamb to the Slaughter. The Welsh dragon slayer or sheep shagger, depending on Huw’s persuasion, Athletico Albertawe jump 5 places into joint 7th with Bollocks to Ballack and I am sure young Michael really gives a toss on £120,000 per week!
Frank & Beans (after I bigged them up last week), Massive Tackle (usually self-bigged up if you know what I mean?) and Here we go again (small bloke, big’s himself up) all drop out of the promotion race.
The table is pretty compact down to Los Cusingos in 17th, and then comes the great underachievers Day, Newport and Waterman.
At the bottom Le Guen's Revolution had a better week but need a Paul Ince type revival to get them off the bottom. Alex Boswell’s Megan & Hannah's Bears stay in the super sad prized place of 2nd from bottom of The Championship.
32 points was enough for Shay’s Jonny Forskins to take over at the top of The Championship pushing Sven & Janas back into 2nd. Thank you 4 the daze and Rose’s Rovers remain 4th and 5th.
New into 5th is W23 MoW Pete Doherty for Allianz and into 6th climbs Lamb to the Slaughter. The Welsh dragon slayer or sheep shagger, depending on Huw’s persuasion, Athletico Albertawe jump 5 places into joint 7th with Bollocks to Ballack and I am sure young Michael really gives a toss on £120,000 per week!
Frank & Beans (after I bigged them up last week), Massive Tackle (usually self-bigged up if you know what I mean?) and Here we go again (small bloke, big’s himself up) all drop out of the promotion race.
The table is pretty compact down to Los Cusingos in 17th, and then comes the great underachievers Day, Newport and Waterman.
At the bottom Le Guen's Revolution had a better week but need a Paul Ince type revival to get them off the bottom. Alex Boswell’s Megan & Hannah's Bears stay in the super sad prized place of 2nd from bottom of The Championship.
Monday, January 29, 2007
My kinda town
I never know who to tip.
Well, I know that you always tip your waitress or waiter, even if they’ve spat in your food and it was cooked by Hannibal Lector, because not tipping in restaurants is just not done is it?
And you always tip the barman a dollar even though pulling a pint never looked particularly difficult and if the barman is a she with a rather lovely cleavage, then surely that is worth a bit extra, for, well the extra’s!
Of course I always tip a cab driver, even though 9 times out of 10, they disobey every single rule that you are reading on the taped list of rules on the back of the driver’s seat and you have to give them directions to the place you wish to go.
But otherwise I never know. There should be laws or rules on tipping etiquette.
Does the nice lady in Starbucks who always remembers my drink get a tip? Or the lady who fetches my coat of the hanger in the cloakroom, or what about the old bloke in the toilet at trendy bars, who offers you a mint or a squirt of Drakkor Noir?
Then there is the maitre d in restaurants who shows you to your table, even though you know where it is, or the young lad who brings up your bags to the hotel room an hour after you checked in? What about the geezer that hails you a cab outside of a hotel because it’s easier than you sticking your arm in the air?
The friendly Korean lady in the dry cleaners whose vocabulary only extends to “starch or no starch?” The students in the grocery store that put your vegetables in a bag or the mailman for masterfully delivering your mail to the right place. Then there is the doorman who opens the door because that is what it says in his job description?
Do you tip the women with a face like a slapped arse in the cinema who serves you popcorn and hates her job more than anything in the world, or the petrol attendant who whacks in the most expensive unleaded fuel there is before you have a chance to get out of the car?
You see after 3 years of living in this country I don’t have a ruddy clue, all I know is that no bastard tips me for doing my job!
Well, I know that you always tip your waitress or waiter, even if they’ve spat in your food and it was cooked by Hannibal Lector, because not tipping in restaurants is just not done is it?
And you always tip the barman a dollar even though pulling a pint never looked particularly difficult and if the barman is a she with a rather lovely cleavage, then surely that is worth a bit extra, for, well the extra’s!
Of course I always tip a cab driver, even though 9 times out of 10, they disobey every single rule that you are reading on the taped list of rules on the back of the driver’s seat and you have to give them directions to the place you wish to go.
But otherwise I never know. There should be laws or rules on tipping etiquette.
Does the nice lady in Starbucks who always remembers my drink get a tip? Or the lady who fetches my coat of the hanger in the cloakroom, or what about the old bloke in the toilet at trendy bars, who offers you a mint or a squirt of Drakkor Noir?
Then there is the maitre d in restaurants who shows you to your table, even though you know where it is, or the young lad who brings up your bags to the hotel room an hour after you checked in? What about the geezer that hails you a cab outside of a hotel because it’s easier than you sticking your arm in the air?
The friendly Korean lady in the dry cleaners whose vocabulary only extends to “starch or no starch?” The students in the grocery store that put your vegetables in a bag or the mailman for masterfully delivering your mail to the right place. Then there is the doorman who opens the door because that is what it says in his job description?
Do you tip the women with a face like a slapped arse in the cinema who serves you popcorn and hates her job more than anything in the world, or the petrol attendant who whacks in the most expensive unleaded fuel there is before you have a chance to get out of the car?
You see after 3 years of living in this country I don’t have a ruddy clue, all I know is that no bastard tips me for doing my job!
More Beere
Breaking News 88888 Manager of week 22
Rob Beere’s Fabulous Fabregas have had a pretty rough season to be honest. A couple of years back Rob looked like he could be a seasonal challenger to the N&R crown but has not delivered this season, although out of the blue he did win MoW in week 9.
However the start of The Championship has given Rob a lift and he took the weekly honours in W22 to collect a fiver by hitting 60 points.
The next best was Pete Doherty for Allianz with 54 points. For those Yankie readers of mine Pete Doherty is a low-life druggie who sings in a band and porks Kate Moss on a regular basis. Next up was Athletico Abertawe and Los Cusingos as The Championship ruled week 22’s scores, which showed what a load of bollocks this new structure I dreamed up is!
Living in Sin for the second week running had an immaculate week and that is 105 points in 14 days for Dougal who has the top 7 in his sights.
Other mentions should go to further Championship team’s Thank you 4 the Daze, Ping Pong Yo-Yo’s and Lamb the Slaughter who had good weeks plus The Premiership’s Brighton Blues who I forgot to mention bombed last week with 8 points but bounced back well this.
Rob Beere’s Fabulous Fabregas have had a pretty rough season to be honest. A couple of years back Rob looked like he could be a seasonal challenger to the N&R crown but has not delivered this season, although out of the blue he did win MoW in week 9.
However the start of The Championship has given Rob a lift and he took the weekly honours in W22 to collect a fiver by hitting 60 points.
The next best was Pete Doherty for Allianz with 54 points. For those Yankie readers of mine Pete Doherty is a low-life druggie who sings in a band and porks Kate Moss on a regular basis. Next up was Athletico Abertawe and Los Cusingos as The Championship ruled week 22’s scores, which showed what a load of bollocks this new structure I dreamed up is!
Living in Sin for the second week running had an immaculate week and that is 105 points in 14 days for Dougal who has the top 7 in his sights.
Other mentions should go to further Championship team’s Thank you 4 the Daze, Ping Pong Yo-Yo’s and Lamb the Slaughter who had good weeks plus The Premiership’s Brighton Blues who I forgot to mention bombed last week with 8 points but bounced back well this.
Sav steps out
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Premiership - week 22 scores
The top 6 was unchanged although last week's two leaders became one as Savchenko Spurs stepped out on his own, four points clear.
In 7th now sit Christian Daily Football Genuis as Rooney & Ronaldo’s rockstars slip 4 places. Lower down but not that many points behind Brighton Blues, East Indian Summer, Living in Sin and Epping 'dog walking' club all make ground.
In the relegation zone Underwriting cop is off the bottom, a place now occupied by Godder’s I Still *ing Hate Chelsea. Wizzi’s wonders and Lovejoy slip into the drop zone.
The top 6 was unchanged although last week's two leaders became one as Savchenko Spurs stepped out on his own, four points clear.
In 7th now sit Christian Daily Football Genuis as Rooney & Ronaldo’s rockstars slip 4 places. Lower down but not that many points behind Brighton Blues, East Indian Summer, Living in Sin and Epping 'dog walking' club all make ground.
In the relegation zone Underwriting cop is off the bottom, a place now occupied by Godder’s I Still *ing Hate Chelsea. Wizzi’s wonders and Lovejoy slip into the drop zone.
Oakley in a daze
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Championship - week 22 scores
Sven & Janas stay top with Jonny Forskins leading the chase. Nose-bleed merchant Oakers is in 3rd after Thank you 4 the daze’s 49 weekly points. My little tip for promotion Frank & Beans move into 5th and Glenn Francis’ Lamb to the slaughter is in 8th.
Lower down both Ping Pong and Pete Doherty for Allianz climbed the table although the biggest mover was Fabulous Fabregas, up 5 places to 19th. And, wait for it Nobby’s North of Crystal Palarce are on the march after storming into (cough, cough) 19th.
The bottom 3 remain unchanged with old Sweaty balls Le Guen's revolution glued to the foot of the table 118 points adrift of the next worst team. Come on Sweats, what’s going on?
Sven & Janas stay top with Jonny Forskins leading the chase. Nose-bleed merchant Oakers is in 3rd after Thank you 4 the daze’s 49 weekly points. My little tip for promotion Frank & Beans move into 5th and Glenn Francis’ Lamb to the slaughter is in 8th.
Lower down both Ping Pong and Pete Doherty for Allianz climbed the table although the biggest mover was Fabulous Fabregas, up 5 places to 19th. And, wait for it Nobby’s North of Crystal Palarce are on the march after storming into (cough, cough) 19th.
The bottom 3 remain unchanged with old Sweaty balls Le Guen's revolution glued to the foot of the table 118 points adrift of the next worst team. Come on Sweats, what’s going on?
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Beckham comes to America
So Becks and his skinny missus are coming to America. What has he done?
Once Goldenballs had the most revered right foot in the business and a haircut that would make every young man in the country head down to the nearest barbers. At times he single handedly won games for his country and was the first Premiership player to add real worth the word ‘assist,’ previously an expression used solely in American sports.
Recently he has swanned around Madrid as part of the glorified but generally shite Galacticos gracing the bench of some of the best stadiums in Europe.
However for the small some of $1m a week Becks has forgone the Galacticos for The Galaxy far, far away in Los Angeles, home of people considered to be madder than Neil Warnock!
So the former England captain will exchange the rarified atmosphere of Champions League tussles with thrilling games played in front of 10,000 people at Real Salt Lake, Columbus Crew and Kansas City Wizards.
Afternoons at The Bernabeu will be exchanged for afternoons at the Home Depot Center, the nearest you will get to Selhurst Park with its more popular Sainsbury’s in the car park.
The Home Depot Center I might add is 13 miles from LA in a town called Carson, so more Petts Wood than Hollywood. Beckham announced that he had taken advice from Tom Cruise about moving to LA, which is a bit like asking Vera Duckworth about a move to Manchester.
Beckham’s new management will consist of Alexi Lalas, one of the more famous American ‘soccer’ players outside of the country. The bloke who had a goatee and a ponytail long before Becks made them famous is LA Galaxy’s president and general manager, whilst Frank Yallop is their coach, who will be well known to Ipswich fans and, well that’s about it.
Yallop along with ex-Liverpool ginger nut Steve Nichol and ex-Celtic striker and reformed boozer Maurice Johnston each manage MLS teams. Yallop has twice before won the title with San Jose Earthquakes, who are now in true American franchise fashion called Houston Dynamos and have also been know as The Utah Threesomes and New Orleans Hurricanes. I did actually make the last two up by the way.
Teammates will include ex Coventry player Cobi Jones, who despite being absolutely appalling at Coventry has 164 caps for the US national team! Honest.
Before Beckham’s arrival the most well known ‘soccer’ player in the country was Landon Donovan, who didn’t quite cut it at Bayer Leverkusen and got homesick so came back to LA to be a rather large carp in a small pond.
Galaxy actually share their Home Depot stadium with Club Deportivo Chivas USA (try singing that one to a tune), a sister club to one that graces the Mexican league and draws it support from the huge Mexican immigrant population in south Los Angeles.
LA Galaxy do have the best support in the MLS and even have an official ‘firm’ called the LA Riot squad! And a mascot called Cozmo, a frog like creature apparently, who whips the crowd into a frenzy in between eating burgers and drooling over the cheerleaders.
Who knows what Beckham can add to football in the USA? If he gets American people to at least consider it a sport for grown up men and not for kids or women, then that will be a start even though the media have been lukewarm to his arrival despite being touted as “the best player in the world”
The best corner taker or free-kick specialist or the best sideburns once maybe, but despite Tom Cruise’s help Becks has much to do to raise the profile of the beautiful game in the US. LA has been home to has-beens before, and not just Tom Cruise. A certain George Best played for the LA Aztecs back in the day, when high profile signings bankrupted the NASL, let’s hope we don’t see that again and that old Goldenballs doesn’t suffer that indignity. At least not many people will notice if he does!
Once Goldenballs had the most revered right foot in the business and a haircut that would make every young man in the country head down to the nearest barbers. At times he single handedly won games for his country and was the first Premiership player to add real worth the word ‘assist,’ previously an expression used solely in American sports.
Recently he has swanned around Madrid as part of the glorified but generally shite Galacticos gracing the bench of some of the best stadiums in Europe.
However for the small some of $1m a week Becks has forgone the Galacticos for The Galaxy far, far away in Los Angeles, home of people considered to be madder than Neil Warnock!
So the former England captain will exchange the rarified atmosphere of Champions League tussles with thrilling games played in front of 10,000 people at Real Salt Lake, Columbus Crew and Kansas City Wizards.
Afternoons at The Bernabeu will be exchanged for afternoons at the Home Depot Center, the nearest you will get to Selhurst Park with its more popular Sainsbury’s in the car park.
The Home Depot Center I might add is 13 miles from LA in a town called Carson, so more Petts Wood than Hollywood. Beckham announced that he had taken advice from Tom Cruise about moving to LA, which is a bit like asking Vera Duckworth about a move to Manchester.
Beckham’s new management will consist of Alexi Lalas, one of the more famous American ‘soccer’ players outside of the country. The bloke who had a goatee and a ponytail long before Becks made them famous is LA Galaxy’s president and general manager, whilst Frank Yallop is their coach, who will be well known to Ipswich fans and, well that’s about it.
Yallop along with ex-Liverpool ginger nut Steve Nichol and ex-Celtic striker and reformed boozer Maurice Johnston each manage MLS teams. Yallop has twice before won the title with San Jose Earthquakes, who are now in true American franchise fashion called Houston Dynamos and have also been know as The Utah Threesomes and New Orleans Hurricanes. I did actually make the last two up by the way.
Teammates will include ex Coventry player Cobi Jones, who despite being absolutely appalling at Coventry has 164 caps for the US national team! Honest.
Before Beckham’s arrival the most well known ‘soccer’ player in the country was Landon Donovan, who didn’t quite cut it at Bayer Leverkusen and got homesick so came back to LA to be a rather large carp in a small pond.
Galaxy actually share their Home Depot stadium with Club Deportivo Chivas USA (try singing that one to a tune), a sister club to one that graces the Mexican league and draws it support from the huge Mexican immigrant population in south Los Angeles.
LA Galaxy do have the best support in the MLS and even have an official ‘firm’ called the LA Riot squad! And a mascot called Cozmo, a frog like creature apparently, who whips the crowd into a frenzy in between eating burgers and drooling over the cheerleaders.
Who knows what Beckham can add to football in the USA? If he gets American people to at least consider it a sport for grown up men and not for kids or women, then that will be a start even though the media have been lukewarm to his arrival despite being touted as “the best player in the world”
The best corner taker or free-kick specialist or the best sideburns once maybe, but despite Tom Cruise’s help Becks has much to do to raise the profile of the beautiful game in the US. LA has been home to has-beens before, and not just Tom Cruise. A certain George Best played for the LA Aztecs back in the day, when high profile signings bankrupted the NASL, let’s hope we don’t see that again and that old Goldenballs doesn’t suffer that indignity. At least not many people will notice if he does!
Premiership and Championship kick off
Breaking News 88888 Manager of week 21
So the 2nd part of the N&R season is well under way. I’ve had a mini mid-season break so need to catch up a little on the scores.
Remember the total scores earned up and until week 20 were carried forward as the teams were divided into the N&R Premiership and the N&R Championship. There’s no shame in being in the Championship it’s that you are not very good and are more Southend United than Manchester United!
A single weekly award of a fiver will still go to the best 7 day score over the two leagues and the latest winner of that award goes to Brian Rutter, whose Goonersmoan notched an superb 82 points, 7 more than In Tatters, and a whole 26 more than the next best Premiership team Living in Sin.
Read on….
So the 2nd part of the N&R season is well under way. I’ve had a mini mid-season break so need to catch up a little on the scores.
Remember the total scores earned up and until week 20 were carried forward as the teams were divided into the N&R Premiership and the N&R Championship. There’s no shame in being in the Championship it’s that you are not very good and are more Southend United than Manchester United!
A single weekly award of a fiver will still go to the best 7 day score over the two leagues and the latest winner of that award goes to Brian Rutter, whose Goonersmoan notched an superb 82 points, 7 more than In Tatters, and a whole 26 more than the next best Premiership team Living in Sin.
Read on….
Nathan & Saveall lead the way
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Premiership - week 21 scores
Cristiano's Allstars and Savchenko Spurs who both came up from Serie B are the early title chasers with both teams on 804 points. Flighty Feet are just 4 points behind in 3rd.
There is a little gap to Glasgow Kiss in 4th with Roubles FC, #1 Strugglers and Rooney & Ronaldo’s allstars tucked in behind them.
Only 56 points separate the 7th team from the bottom, so each manager has it all to play for. Remember the bottom 8 teams will be relegated.
Cristiano's Allstars and Savchenko Spurs who both came up from Serie B are the early title chasers with both teams on 804 points. Flighty Feet are just 4 points behind in 3rd.
There is a little gap to Glasgow Kiss in 4th with Roubles FC, #1 Strugglers and Rooney & Ronaldo’s allstars tucked in behind them.
Only 56 points separate the 7th team from the bottom, so each manager has it all to play for. Remember the bottom 8 teams will be relegated.
Top Mark
Breaking news 8888 The N&R Championship - week 21 scores
Sven & Janas Bye occupy the top spot after the first week of action with Jonny Forskins and the Phullbacks 11 points behind, in fact unlike the tight Premiership table, The Championship table is pretty spread out with 46 points separating the top 10.
Lee Baughan’s Le Guen’s revolution (so revolutionized of course that he got fired) are an amazing 102 points adrift at the bottom.
Sven & Janas Bye occupy the top spot after the first week of action with Jonny Forskins and the Phullbacks 11 points behind, in fact unlike the tight Premiership table, The Championship table is pretty spread out with 46 points separating the top 10.
Lee Baughan’s Le Guen’s revolution (so revolutionized of course that he got fired) are an amazing 102 points adrift at the bottom.
People that make living in England not very appealing
1. Jade Goody
Racist or just a complete half-wit? And why do we care? Big Brother and the general British populate have made this poor excuse for a human-being famous and a millionaire to boot. When I was kid I was never a fan of just the upper class having the opportunity to become rich, mainly because Catford Boys didn’t have much of a record for producing millionaires, Spike Milligan aside. But if reality television and the tabloids can create dim-witted waste of spaces like Jade Goody then I would rather have no part of it. Goody says she is the “25th most influential person in the world.” Well maybe in Chaville but she disgusts me and make’s me embarrassed to be English.
2. Ben May and Glenn Johnson
Glenn Johnson earns 20 grand a week, Ben May plays for Millwall, so probably a little less but money as they say does not buy class. These two professional footballers were blessed with a talent but very few brain cells.
Despite their considerable salaries and having agents who wipe their arses for them, they were found running out of B&Q (think Home Depot to my American readers) with boxes of toilet seats with which they had changed the price tags for those of cheaper ones. When the security guard (annual salary £15k) stopped Johnson (annual salary £1m) and May (annual salary £300k) they were said to be both laughing their heads off. What is wrong with these people?
Racist or just a complete half-wit? And why do we care? Big Brother and the general British populate have made this poor excuse for a human-being famous and a millionaire to boot. When I was kid I was never a fan of just the upper class having the opportunity to become rich, mainly because Catford Boys didn’t have much of a record for producing millionaires, Spike Milligan aside. But if reality television and the tabloids can create dim-witted waste of spaces like Jade Goody then I would rather have no part of it. Goody says she is the “25th most influential person in the world.” Well maybe in Chaville but she disgusts me and make’s me embarrassed to be English.
2. Ben May and Glenn Johnson
Glenn Johnson earns 20 grand a week, Ben May plays for Millwall, so probably a little less but money as they say does not buy class. These two professional footballers were blessed with a talent but very few brain cells.
Despite their considerable salaries and having agents who wipe their arses for them, they were found running out of B&Q (think Home Depot to my American readers) with boxes of toilet seats with which they had changed the price tags for those of cheaper ones. When the security guard (annual salary £15k) stopped Johnson (annual salary £1m) and May (annual salary £300k) they were said to be both laughing their heads off. What is wrong with these people?
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