My kinda town

I was recently in New York and hotel rooms were hard to come by. Anyway they always make us top & tail at Aon so it was less of a problem - although the 6ft 3in young female broker in our team couldn't quite get the measure of our expense restrictions.

The reason, I found out later, for the lack of hotel rooms in the Big Apple was the Annual Country & Western awards (the CMA's).

I found this very strange because New York doesn't seem to me to be the home of Country & Western, I thought it was all Rap and RnB, but hey what does an old bloke like me know who still lusts after the Flock of Seagulls.

In fact I find the whole Country & Western thing strange. Who actually listens to that depressive crap, with old blokes with pony tails, tight Levi's and leather boots? Ok, apart from Francey?

Songs tend to be about dead folk, lost loves and riding horses. This is an actual example of a chorus from CMA winners Brooks & Dunn:

Says he was in the war when in the navy
Lost his wife, lost his baby
Broke down and asked him one time
How ya keep from going crazy
He said I'll see my wife and son in just a little while
I asked him what he meant
He looked at me and smiled....

Cheery, eh? Anyway's also fancied myself as a songwriter, so have applied for a transfer to Tennessee and will write a bit of Country & Western in my spare time. This is my first shot:

Get home from work
Found out my dog just died
Tell missus but she got a 21-year old bloke ridin' her hide
So pop down the pub for some cheer
But am told they have ran out of lite beer

What do you think? Not bad eh? How about this as my follow up hit:

Been sacked from the factory for keep being late
Went home to find my wife has had her brains blown out
That really sucked and the mess is a right pain
Too make it worse the Addicks have lost at White Hart Lane

All I need now is the pony tail and the tight leather jeans. Let me find Francey's number see if he can lend me a pair.