Paul Scholes

"I am not a man of many words but I can honestly say that playing football is all I have ever wanted to do and to have had such a long and successful career at Manchester United has been a real honour."

Manchester United's Paul Scholes has ended his playing career, aged 36. Scholes made his United debut in 1994, making 676 appearances, and will now join the coaching staff.

His retirement came after he helped the club win a record 19th league title, the 10th of his career, and his last game was Saturday's Champions League final loss to Barcelona.

PAUL SCHOLES CAREER STATISTICS:
676 Man Utd appearances
150 goals
66 England caps
14 England goals
Premier League winner: 1996, 1997, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2003, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2011
FA Cup: 1996, 1999, 2004
Champions League winner: 2008
League Cup winner: 2009, 2010
PFA Team of the Year: 2003, 2007
18th highest scorer in Premier League history (102 goals)
4th most booked player in Premier League history (87 times)
Chances of finding him on the front page of a newspaper: 0

RIP's

As you probably know I tend to put up some RIP's when I think they are deserving. You think about death more as you get older apparently!

Anyway three great people died in May. John Sullivan was a genius comedy writer, Henry Cooper a statesman for British sport and Seve Ballesteros a master and an inspiration to many. What follows are tributes to each one of them.

John Sullivan RIP

Comedy gold (click)

John Sullivan was born in South London, his Dad was a plumber and his Mum a cleaner. He left school at 15 with no qualifications. But none of that mattered, because what John Sullivan had was a quality and a skill that very few people have. Sullivan had an imagination, a craft of the English language and a determination to succeed.

For years after leaving school he did numerous low paying jobs but never gave up sending scripts to the BBC. Eventually he got himself a job at the Beeb in the Props department and in 1977 he made his breakthrough with the BBC commissioning a series called Citizen Smith. Who could forget Wolfie?

Power to the people (click)

What many people didn't know was that before Citizen Smith the Two Ronnies often used John Sullivan to write sketches for them, including Sid & George.

It's a duck (click)

Watching this clip, Sullivan's work had a very clever knack of being timeless, which much sketch comedy is not. His characters were always deadpan, surreal and vivid.

Sullivan's genius was that his comedy was both rooted in reality and given wings by sheer comic imagination. His characters spoke like people that he – and therefore his viewers – knew, but where the real market traders of Peckham may have called each other "wally" and "plonker" (and quite possibly much more) and longed to be rich, Sullivan's brilliance was to give Del Boy absurd pretensions, a bizarrely mangled vocabulary of half-learned French words, and to make him not an unpleasantly dishonest money-grubber, but a dreamer.

Only Fools is by most people's judgement the funniest and most consistenly funniest comedy show ever on British Television. Sure Fawlty Towers often wins the plaudits but there were only 12 shows made.

The popularity and longevity of Only Fools and Horses was a mixed blessing for Sullivan. I was kind of tied into the success of it, that I would suspect annoyed him as his terrific imagination wasn't allowed to compose anything else.

He did write other hugely successful shows though. His relationship comedy Just Good Friends, and as a teenager I used to love how cheeky Paul Nicholas as Vince was.

Wasn't Jan Francis sexy (click)

Just Good Friends was the nearest he got to a smartly tailored American sitcom, although his funny and quite melancholic Dear John was actually was made into an American sitcom (any of you Americans remember it?)

Both versions (click)

But it is Only Fools And Horses that will stand out as Sullivan's greatest achievement. The show was first broadcast in 1981, with the final Christmas special going out in 2003.

In those 22 years it became a British institution, making stars of its cast members including David Jason (Del Boy) and Nicholas Lyndhurst (Rodney).

One extraordinary night in 1996, caused nearly 24 million people to turn their sets on to the BBC. He ended the show's run by allowing Del Boy to achieve his stated dream of becoming a millionaire; then, when begged to revive the show by the BBC, realised that there was little humour in the characters being rich, and relieved them of their wealth once more.

He brought female characters to the fore, marrying off Del Boy and Rodney, and - in a genre which has since become increasingly and relentlessly teenage - added a note of maturity by having his characters deal with the ramifications of a miscarriage. And, when perhaps his actors no longer wanted to portray the characters that had made them national treasures, he retooled the series, first as the Boycie and Marlene spin-off The Green Green Grass, and then an Only Fools and Horses prequel, Rock and Chips, which sadly was to be aired the week Sullivan died.

Sullivan also wrote Roger, Roger, Heartbreak Hotel and Sitting Pretty.

What legacy John Sullivan leaves will emerge with the due passage of time. If he has imitators, they are not fashionable, but his influence is still likely to run deep. Any British show that has clear, well-rounded and only apparently simple characters is in his debt. Any comedy whose humour is based on character rather than verbal or visual gags or silly set-ups must tip a nod to his work. And anyone seeking to write comedy who is even only slightly aware of sitcom's lineage would be well advised to sit down with a DVD of Only Fools and Horses – or almost anything by Sullivan – and watch it to see how it is done by a master of popular, populist, intelligent and witty comedy.

Sir Henry Cooper RIP

Henry Cooper has left us and it is not just boxing’s loss, it is a nation which is so much poorer for his passing. Because he was not just a champion, he was our champion, our pal, our favourite. Yes, Our ‘Enery.

Sir Henry Cooper, beloved of British postwar generations as no heavyweight boxer before him died aged 76 on the 1st May. His warmth and indomitable personality, together with his rise from humble roots, gave him a popularity far beyond his sport's normal boundaries. He was never world champion, but his good spirits seemed to hold a gift for everyone, even for his most notable conqueror, Muhammad Ali.

At Wembley stadium, on 18 June 1963, Cooper landed Ali, then known as Cassius Clay, on his pants with a punch that made boxing history – a left hook travelling five and a half inches at 30mph with 60 times the force of gravity, striking the side of the American's jaw. The world came to know it as 'Enry's 'Ammer, and it felled Ali as never before. However, in front of 55,000 people, Ali was "saved by the bell" amid unique controversy.

Ali caught Cooper with a typical blow in the third round. Jim Wicks, Cooper's manager, known as "The Bishop" and always protective of his man, was all for ending the fight as the blood flowed down his fighter's cheek. Cooper, in the corner interval, pleaded for one more round as his "cuts" man, Danny Holland, applied an adrenalin-Vaseline compound.

In Cooper's view, he could still take his man – and he very nearly did. The 'Ammer smacked into Ali's chin as he backed into the ropes, the American's speed for once not saving him. Ali slid down the ropes, the slowness helping him. The referee, Tommy Little, reached a count of five, then Ali rose, in Cooper's view like an amateur, his arms dangling, an open target. But the bell rang, and boxing history took another turn. "Oh boy!" was Cooper's autobiographical note. "If it had only happened in the second minute." As it was, Ali took the world title in his next fight, against Sonny Liston.

Cooper was to meet Ali – by then, his name had been formally changed after his conversion to Islam – for a world title fight at Arsenal's Highbury stadium, London, on 21 May 1966. Again the fight had to be stopped for a cut eye, this time in the sixth round. The gash was deeper and longer than any of Cooper's career. The Englishman reckoned himself narrowly ahead on points, but the blow was typically Ali, a long punch grazing with the heel of the glove. "It was a physical thing that let me down," Cooper said. "Prominent bones and weak tissue around the eyes. But I was never as bad as my brother, George. After all, I went on until I was 37." For years afterwards, Ali would pay tribute to Cooper. British boxing writers visiting him in the US would be told: "Give my regards to Henry."

Overall, Cooper's record was unmatched by any British fighter of his or any other time – winner of 40 of his 55 contests, 27 by knockout, one drawn, in a 17-year career from 1954 to 1971; winner of three Lonsdale belts for three successive British heavyweight title victories; holder of European and Commonwealth/Empire titles for sustained periods, the British for about 11 years. Many thought him unlucky to lose his last fight, and all three titles, to Joe Bugner, with a controversial points decision by the referee Harry Gibbs at Wembley stadium, on 16 March 1971.

Cooper, too, could be swift and able with the spoken word. In a 1970 TV debate, Lady (Edith) Summerskill, a notable opponent of boxing, inquired: "Mr Cooper, have you looked in the mirror and seen the state of your nose?" Quickly, he replied: "Well, have you? Boxing is my excuse – what's yours?" It was ungallant, he acknowledged afterwards, but after a pleasant-enough discussion she had rather ambushed him.

Cooper's career coincided with the dawn of the black-and-white TV era, and he was soon to stand with Stanley Matthews, Lester Piggott, Bobby Charlton, Roger Bannister, Leonard Hutton and Denis Compton as a national sporting hero. In his case, too, it extended to a long semi-retirement in which charity and public entertainment played a significant part. He was knighted in 2000 as much for public services as for his boxing skill and courage. They were qualities much leavened by a natural humour and modesty. He was an unabashed royalist, and made no secret of his pleasure in attending lunch at Buckingham Palace with the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh.

Born in Southwark, south-east London, Cooper always saw himself as an "Elephant" boy, meaning the Elephant and Castle area, famous in the early part of the century for horse-trading. There, his half-Irish grandfather bought and sold horses. The Thomas a Becket gym, where Cooper trained for the Ali world title fight, was part of that heritage.

The family had moved to a council estate in Bellingham, south-east London, in 1940, but the twins were soon evacuated to Lancing, West Sussex. The boys returned to Athelney Road school, queueing for rations, chopping wood, doing paper rounds and generally living off their wits. "Golf balls were scarce so we'd nick them off the fairway, run round the clubhouse and sell 'em back to grateful members for a tanner," said Cooper, who later became a chairman of the Variety Club golf section

Appointed OBE in 1969, Cooper was voted BBC sports personality of the year in 1967 and 1970. He made no great fortune out of boxing. His decision to retire was already established before his last fight, against Bugner in July 1971. Modestly comfortable, he still needed to auction off his Lonsdale belts after the collapse of a Lloyd's of London syndicate lost him a huge lump of his savings. The Canterbury auction made only £40,000 where £100,000 was expected. He collaborated on books, including one with me in 1972, a taped and edited life story that succeeded David Niven's The Moon's a Balloon as a paperback bestseller, at 40p a copy.

For three years, Cooper chaired a team in the BBC's Question of Sport quizshow, his knowledge of sport proving encyclopedic. Advertisers homed in. For Brut, he would become associated with aftershave, for the NHS, he was a face to encourage flu jabs for the elderly. His charity work included raising funds for more than 100 Sunshine coaches for children who were ill or had disabilities.

Our 'Enry was a fantastic boxer, a national treasure but more than anything a top bloke.

Daily Telegraph: A farewell to a true British working class hero.
That punch: You Tube.

Seve Ballesteros RIP

The morning of Saturday 7th May brought with it the sad news of the death of one of sport’s great personalities. Seve Ballesteros, who lit up the golfing world in the 1970s and 1980s in a glittering career that saw him win five majors and 87 professional titles, succumbed to his long battle against a brain tumour at the age of just 54.

In the most successful career of any modern European golfer, Ballesteros won three Open Championships, two Green Jackets and was ranked as World Number One for a total of 61 weeks, becoming the first player to hold the title when official rankings were introduced in 1986.

Despite his somewhat erratic driving style, Ballesteros was renowned for his sublime short game: his delicate touch, vision and inventive shot selection so often got him out of trouble, including most famously when in the course of winning his first major, Ballesteros made birdie on the 16th hole despite hitting his tee shot into a car park.

But it is more than his sheer brilliant talent by which people will remember him – his vibrant personality and joyous attitude to both golf and life set him apart from his fellow professionals. Jack Nicklaus paid tribute to Ballesteros by saying that “Seve’s enthusiasm was just unmatched by anybody I think that ever played the game”.

Daily Telegraph: Seve was the Elvis of golf.

Week 41 review

With the title sorted it was all down the the 5 team relegation battle to follow West Ham into the abyss.

Blackpool despite being ahead at the OT, said a sad goodbye to the Premier League after losing 4-2 to the Champions. Wigan won at Stoke thanks to a late Rodallega goal and survived another season.

Wolves were 3-down at home to Blackburn at half time but pulled two goals back in the 2nd half. But defeat didn't matter as the amber and gold's under Mick McCarthy survived. As did Blackburn, too good to go down in many people's eyes.

Wolves stayed up because Birmingham lost to Spurs 2-1. The League Cup winners had a terrible run after that Wembley victory and a late and rare Pavlyuchenko goal put the Blue noses down. That win secured Spurs a Europa Cup berth.

Sunderland rubbed salt in the Hammers' wounds at Upton Park winning 3-0 and thus ending any realistic hope that Kevin Keen would get the manager's job.

Elsewhere Man City beat Bolton 2-0 to finish above Arsenal who drew away at Fulham 2-2. Chelsea lost their final game 1-0 at Everton. Beckford capping a fine season with the goal. Ancelotti was sacked just after.

Newcastle were 3-up at home to WBA but Hodgson's men stormed back with a hat-trick from Tchoyi to win a point.

Finally Villa completed a good last few weeks by seeing of Liverpool 1-0. Stewart Dwoning the goalscorer.

Photograph of the week

Pure genius.

Masterclass

It's not often you see Manchester United dominated on a football field like they were this evening. It was almost surreal and I felt a bit embarrassed for them at times as the English champions chased shadows.

It was a footballing masterclass by Barcelona as Messi illuminated Wembley more than anyone else has since it was re-opened. I unexpectedly punched the air when Rooney equalised and for a moment it was game on, but Barca just continued their carousel passing game and after their 3rd goal finally arrived the Spanish side just brought the game to a gentle landing.

How one marks Lionel Messi is anyone's business, the man just ghosts around the pitch with the ball rarely far from his feet and in Pep Guardiola, they have one of football's true geniuses.

Jokes of the week

Thanks to Wardy for these.

Ji Sung Park was the first person 2 give the game away. He's been calling him Lyin Giggs all season.

A film is being made about "a footballer who takes out a super injunction to stop a Welsh girl revealing their affair" it's going to be called "Saving Ryans Privates."

The government are introducing a tuition fee for low ability students who have no hope of achieving anything in life, it's called the 'Avram' Grant.

West Ham are 16/1 to gain promotion from the championship. So for those who do not understand betting, if you place a £10 bet, you lose £10.

Two Scouse cellmates, both writing letters home, one turns to the other and says.
"Ow d'ya spell Darryl?" The other chews the end of his crayon for a second before replying "Y'don't know anyone called Darryl?" "I know!" replies the first "I'm writing to me Mam an I'm asking for a pair a shoes Darryl fit me!"

Last night I was awoken by four West Ham fans outside my house playing football with a hedgehog. I was absolutely disgusted and just about to call the RSPCA when the hedgehog went 1-0 up!

Ready's Benfleet Bet - FA Cup Predictions update

The semi-finals have been scored and the final is in the mix.

It looks like it is between me, Bixby and Francey to take the N&R Benfleet Bet prize. Below are the total scores with the semi-final scores in brackets. Rutts doing the best in this round.

Benfleet Bet Predictions Table.
1= Nobby 63 (2)
1= Neil Bixby 63 (2)
3. Francey 61 (0)
4= Doyley 56 (0)
4= Ken Cobbett 56 (0)
6= Ready 55 (0)
6= Barry Plummer 55 (0)
8. Neil Addington 54 (0)
9. Jason Syrett 52 (0)
10= Alastair Bigg 51 (0)
10= Barry Paull 51 (0)
12. Ben Guarino 50 (2)
13= Mr Sav 47 (0)
13= Brian Rutter 47(4)
13= Tim Harris 47 (0)
16= Mrs Sav 46 (0)
16= John MacGowan 46 (0)
18. Neil Reynolds 44 (2)
19= Mark Dewberry 42 (0)
19= Kirstie Baillie 42 (0)
21= Oakers 41 (no scores)
21= Neville White 41 (0)
21= Ricky Wood 41 (2)
24= Mark Gregory 40 (0)
24= Steve Black 40 (0)
26. Danny Rose 39 (0)
27= Alex Boswell 38 (no scores)
27= Steve Merchant 38 (0)
27= Rob Munden 38 (no scores)
30= Aaron Barden 37 (no scores)
30= Ian Kennett 37 (0)
30= Richard Richards 37 (0)
33= Godders 35 (no scores)
33= Greg Foulger 35 (2)
35. Paul Long 34 (0)
36. Henry Williams 23 (no scores)

Breaking News

Pleased to be able to share this scoop with you. Man United's team for Saturday's Champions League Final v Barcelona will be:

Van der Saar
Rafael
Ferdinand
Vidic
Evra
Valencia
Carrick
An unamed Premiership footballer
Park
Rooney
Hernandez

Ferguson praises Ancellotti

Sacked Chelsea manager Carlo Ancelotti was supported by Sir Alex Ferguson on Monday night when the Scot collected the LMA manager of the year award.

"Carlo you are a fantastic man and you have showed great courage in coming to the dinner tonight, well done," said Ferguson.

Gus Hiddink, manager of Turkey, Dutchman Marco van Basten and Andre Villas-Boas, who led Porto to the Europa League title this season, are also possible contenders.

MANAGERIAL RECORDS UNDER ROMAN ABRAMOVICH
• Guus Hiddink 2.43 pts/match
• Avram Grant 2.24
• Jose Mourinho 2.23
• Carlo Ancelotti 2.03
• Claudio Ranieri 1.98
• Luiz Felipe Scolari 1.97

Photograph of the week

"This season's performances have fallen short of expectations and the club feels the time is right to make this change ahead of next season's preparations." - a statement released by Chelsea FC moments after they sack Carlo Ancelotti, the club's 6th manager in 7 years. Nice.

It's Munden's to lose

N&R Play-Off's for the 2010/11 League Title - weeks 40
Rob's To Elland Back are one round of games away from winning the N&R FL title for the first ever time. 27 points behind is KC's Clowns, who after an average week 40 have it all to do in the final week.

The Capello Index are up to 3rd 34 points behind KC. Good on Paper remain 4th, and Bingo after adding just 27 in week 40 slip to 5th.

Loads of Roubles move up to 6th, Paris Eagles also climb to 7th with Bobby Z and FFC 4Ever all dropping down the table. Baron Greenback stay 10th.

1. To Elland Back, 1,466 pts
----------------------------
2. KC's Clowns, 1,439 pts
3. The Capello Index 1,405 pts

Make mine a Guinness

Week 40 - Manager of the Week
The best N&R closer in the field Steve Black swept to the week 40 MoW prize, his first of the season with a 77 point haul. This takes him to 2nd in Div 1 behind Rob Munden and a score better than 5 of the Play-Off contenders!

Barry Paull was next with 72 points, pushing our Parisian up the Play-Off table. Tim Harris scored 68, Neil Bixby 67 and favourite for the coveted title Rob Munden with 65. Ken meanwhile scored 44.

Other scores worth a mention were Emma 57, Rich Richards 56, Godders 56, Dewbs 55, John McGowan 54, Sweaty 52, Lee Horne 52, Ricky 50 and Nobby 50.

Lowest in week 40 was Soozie, dear dear me, with 9.

6 fighting over 3 promotion places

Promotion battle - week 40
The N&R Div 2 top 10 were unaltered in week 40. Calculated Risk hold the last promotion spot with one week left. Still not a chance, Blunty and Sons of Pitches have one round of matches to grab a place in the N&R elite for next season.

8. FC Wood, 1,296 pts
9. Chart This Int'l, 1,290 pts
10. Calculated Risk, 1,271 pts
---------------------------
11. Still not a chance, 1,267 pts
12. Blunty 11, 1,257 pts
13. Sons of Pitches, 1,256

Relegation battle rages at JRP

Relegation battle - weeks 40
With a week to go, Godders' SYRFLTHLPk moved out of the relegation zone to be replaced by old mate Danny's Arsene Knows. Soozie's Sizzlers are 3 points ahead of Aston Globetrotters with AON United, Hip, Hip Hooray, Nortius Maximus and Jimmy 5 Bellies seemingly safe.

15. Jimmy 5 Bellies, 1,242 pts
16. Nortius Maximus, 1,236 pts
17. Hip, Hip Hooray, 1,234 pts
18. AON United, 1,232 pts
19. SYRFLTLPk, 1,230 pts
20. Soozie's Sizzlers, 1,209 pts
--------------------------------
21. Aston Globetrotters, 1,206 pts
22. Arsene Knows, 1,201 pts
23. Glasgow Kiss, 1,169 pts

Week 40 review

Man U won the title at Blackburn thanks to Wayne Rooney's penalty. Blackpool made sure they kept their season alive with a great 4-3 win over local rivals Bolton, Wolves had a huge win at the Stadium of Light thanks to goals from Craddock, Fletcher and Elokobi and West Ham were finally put out of their misery when Wigan beat them 3-2 after being 2-down.

Birmingham put themselves in big trouble losing at home to Fulham, Spurs won at Liverpool meaning a Europa Cup place was in their own hands, WBA beat Everton, Villa and Darren Bent banged another nail in Wenger's coffin and Chelsea were held at home by Newcastle United with Taylor scoring a late equaliser at The Bridge.

Earlier in the week Man City secured Champions League football when they beat Spurs 1-0 with a Crouchy o.g.

Team Challenge - Two horse race

QBE are in pole position to collect the prestigious N&R Team Challenge Trophy. But hang on, in their first ever season Gravity are close behind - 18 points in fact and with both Mark and Ricky having great seasons they are still very much in the race.

The others are just making up the numbers now sadly. Holders Bluefin with Keith leading the charge have had a good end to the season and they are now 3rd. RSA are up to 4th.

In 5th is the Wardy and Waters combo at HDI Gerling, with Tokio in 6th. Dropping like a stone is Chartis proving how hard it is to win this thing with a big squad. Despite Ken, Alastair, Barry and even Francey having excellent campaigns others have dragged them down. If it still exists the annual curry this year will be bought by either Hilary or Richard.

JRP have disappointed this season, both Danny and Pete could get relegated from the top flight. A bit like Everton and Liverpool going down to be honest.

In 9th is the mass of Aon Benfield brokers. Steve, Johnny Mc, Neil and an unsing hero in James have all done well, but they have been let down by some of their team mates.

Talking of a let down, in last place is the Aon International crew. Davor has picked up the ball and ran with it in recent weeks as he strives for promotion but Nobby, Tim & Dennis and last and certainly least Muzza have all been let downs.

The short strokes

N&R Play-Off's for the 2010/11 League Title - weeks 39
To Elland Back have a slender 6 point lead over KC's Clowns. Bingo FC are a further 35 points back, and just about in the chase. Same with Good on paper but both Simon and Mark are probably relying on Rob and Ken to slip up in the last two weeks.

The Capello Index are 5th with FFC 4 ever 17 points behind in 6th.

Still in 7th is Bobby Z, 8th Loads of Roubles, 9th Paris Eagles with Baron Greenback Rangers in 10th 128 points behind the leader.

2 weeks left.

Photograph of the week

West Ham's end of season Player of the Year dinner ended in chaos last night after Demba Ba refused to sign an autograph for a fan. A fracas ensued as fans fought with police, who were quick on the scene and the players escaped out of the back door!

Full story here.

Oakers dokey

Week 39 - Manager of the Week
Oakers won his first MoW in week 39. a fiver will find it's way into Al's pocket when we see him in the summer. 40 points was enough, a whole 9 more than Steve Black. If only Steve could start like he finishes.

31 was also the score from McGowan and Ready. 30 for new promotion candidate Ricky Wood and 28 from both Neil Reynolds and Stocky.

26 from the happy Francey, 25 Chris Wright and 24 from title challenger KC, not title chaser Aaron and Mark 'I don't care because we have 19' Simmons.

From the title race Rob scored 21, Wardy 23, Mark 23, Rich Richards 20 and Steve 13.

The week's worst performance was held jointly by Glenn Francis and the Tim & Dennis combo, who mustered just 10 points

Woody on the up

Promotion battle - week 39
Ooh Neville's Still not a chance fall out of the top 10 in week 39. They are replaced by FC Wood. Chart This Int'l are also in reach and Calculated Risk are playing a dangerous game.

Blunty, Sons of Pitches and maybe Brighton Blues have it all to play for.

Kennett in danger

Relegation battle - weeks 39
Aston Globetrotters are still in trouble but they are just a point from Arsene Knows. Could Danny be the 4th previous champion to play next season on Div 2?

Nortius Maximus have also been dragged down to the relegation battle, but at least Ian is not a previous champion - anything but!

Soozie's Sizzlers, my Lost in the triangle, Hip Hip Hooray, Tanus Terriers and AON United are all not safe.

2010/11 N&R Prize Money

Drum roll please. This season's prizes have been announced following an extraordinary meeting at N&R HQ.

They will be as follows:

N&R FL Champion - £250 plus coveted title trophy
Runner Up - £180
3rd - £160
4th - £125
5th - £100
6th - £80
7th - £70
8th - £60
9th - £50
10th - £40

*These prizes are for the Play-Off final positions. A prize will be awarded for any manager that beats one of the Play-Off finalist scores from Div 1 or Div 2.

The bottom 10 manager's in Div 1 will be relegated and will start next season in Div 2. The top 10 manager's in Div 2 will be promoted and will start next season in Div 1.

N&R Cup Winners - Trophy
Team Challenge Winners - Trophy

Manager of the Week - £5 each or shared equally if any one week was a tie.

Benfleet Bet Predictions Winner - £30

Best weekly score - £30
Worst weekly score - £30

The 2nd worst total overall score (Penultimate Prize) - £25

All prizes in GBP but will be converted to USD at £1 to $1.60.

Rob and Ken neck and neck

Week 38 - Manager of the Week
Lower scoring than week 37 but still as vital. Ken picked up the best score and kept up the pressure on Rob, who scored 8 less.

Emma had another excellent week and has shown some really good end of season form. She hitt 44. Another closer Steve Black scored 42, 41 for Brett and 39 for Rob Munden. Him and Ken are hard to separate at the moment.

Kirsty now at Millers scored 37, Neil Bixby 36 with Neil Wallis 35. Old muckers Alan Oakley and Alan Waters both scored 32 with Danny Rose, Tim & Dennis, Mark Gregory and Ricky all with 31.

The week's lowest challenged the Worst weekly score of the season, and it was 3 by Alex Boswell. Ben Guarino was only slightly better with 4 and Wenners scored 5.

3 weeks left.

Godfrey & creme

Week 37 - Manager of the Week
A cracking score of 85 from relegation threatened Godders in week 37. This gives the multi-champion hope of a relegation reprive. Our man in Mexico, Greg weighed in with an impressive 79, with title chaser Rob scoring 78. A points total that moved him back to the top of the table above Ken, who scored 46.

With 76 points was Soozie, then Chris Wright and Davor shared next place with 67.

On 64 was week 36's MoW Rutts - blimey Bri, talk about leave it late mate! And then with 63 was Steve Merchant, Paul & Christian Long and Ready.

Lowest score in a high scoring week was Tony Murray. Shocker.

Ricky, Andy and Ben chase promotion places

Promotion battle - week 37 and 38
I think it is fair to say that KC's Clowns, Bingo FC, Good on paper, The Capello Index, FFC 4Ever and Bobby Z have bigger fish to fry but they are all up, technically if not mathmatically.

Baron Greenback does need to keep an eye over his shoulder, but Chart this Int'l, Calculated Risk and Still not a chance are being chased down the final straight by FC Wood, Blunty and Sons of Pitches.

Brighton Blues need some points of Gus Poyet proportions.

Sydney who?

Relegation battle - weeks 37 and 38
Arsene Knows worked their way out of the relegation dogfight with Aston Globetrotters dropping into the zone for the first time this season. Henry has just moved to Sydney and has been probably slightly sidetracked.

Red Roy, Morgan's Machines, Lazarus Utd, ex champions 2Infinity & Beyond and Fabio's Flops are all doomed. Simples.

Torres Rosso, Rhubarb & Custard and Glasgow kiss need a miracle whilst another ex-champion Godders' SYRFLTLPk are still fighting to stay up.

Robbed

N&R Play-Off's for the 2010/11 League Title - weeks 37 and 38
To Elland Back gained the lead of the title race in week 37 but was pegged back in week 38 to just 9 points by MoW KC's Clowns.

Bingo look adrift in 3rd now, with Good on paper just a few points behind in 4th. The Capello Index need a big push from the last few weeks and FFC 4Ever, Bobby Z, Loads of Roubles, Paris Eagles and Baron Greenback look like they are now challenging for better prize money.

3 weeks to go.

Photograph of the week

The penalty that gave Aon, sorry Manchester United their 19th league title. Congratulations to Man U and their N&R FL supporters.

N&R Cup Semi Finals

We have two finalists of the N&R Cup, which will take place over week 41.

In the semi's (week 38) title challenger Rob beat Ricky and Neville just edged past Ian to set up the final game.

N&R Cup Semi Final results:

Ricky Wood 31-39 Rob Munden
Neville White 25-22 Ian Kennett

Doing the Poznan

Man City fans adopted this celebration after they played Lech Poznań in the Europa League on 21st October 2010.

During the game the whole of the Poznań end turned their back to the pitch, joined arms and jumped up and down in unison. Many City supporters were inspired and since this game more and more City fans have taken to it and the dance has rapidly caught on around stadiums in the country.

In one game against Wolverhampton Wanderers all 46,000 supporters in the stadium, including the Wolves fans did 'The Poznan'. And now of course Wembley has also been graced with this dance named in honour of the Polish club and was in fact copied by City's players after the final whistle on Saturday.

Meanwhile Lech Poznań have also been in the news but for all the wrong reasons.

Road to Wembley - Cup goes to Manchester

Why the Premier League decided to host league games on the same day at the FA Cup Final is beyond me. But as it was Man Utd did their best to usurp their local rivals' big moment after Manchester City ended a barren sequence of 35 years without a major trophy.

Toure was City's Wembley hero, the same man who got the semi-final winner against Manchester United. The giant Ivory Coast midfield man was on target 16 minutes from time to set the seal on their first top-level success since the 1976 League Cup win against Newcastle United.

Roberto Mancini's side dominated throughout against a disappointing Stoke City, who never came close to reproducing the form that swept Bolton Wanderers aside to reach their first FA Cup final.

Manchester City were only kept at bay by an outstanding first-half display from Stoke keeper Thomas Sorensen, as he produced saves from Carlos Tevez and Mario Balotelli while David Silva also squandered a glorious chance.

The Dane was powerless, however, in the moment that finally ended the long wait for Manchester City as Toure pounced on a loose ball 10 yards out to thrash his finish past Sorensen in front of the delirious hordes of sky blue supporters. See Poznan post.

The entire 2011 Road to Wembley

This years N&R Road to Wembley started with Bottesford Town from near Scunthorpe and it ended with Man City winning their first trophy since Liam Gallagher was in shorts.

On the way we unearthed a couple of giant killers namely Buxton, who we found out include the N&R FL manager Greg Foulger's parents as local die-hard supporters. That was fun and they lasted until the very last minute of the last round of qualifying before getting knocked out by Conference big spenders and eventual play-off qualifiers Fleetwood Town.

Torquay then beat both Walsall and Carlisle from a higher division before being giant-killed themselves by Crawley Town.

Creepy Crawley were described as the Man U of the non-league and sure enough that is who they were drawn out of the hat with in the 5th Round. It was a day for dreamers as United scraped through by a solitary goal in front of almost 75,000 people at Old Trafford.

Crawley went on to win at a canter the Conference and will play in League 2 next season.

Meanwhile United dispatched of Arsenal but lost to local rivals City, who returned to Wembley this weekend and lifted the trophy against Stoke City.

A full run down of the games and attendance are here:

Extra Preliminary Round
Teveral 0 Bottesford Town 0
Att: 72

Extra Preliminary Round Replay
Bottesford Town 3 Teveral 1
Att: 85

Preliminary Round
Bottesford Town 2 Barrow Town 1
Att:

1st Qualifying Round
Bottesford Town 0 Buxton 3
Att: 135

2nd Qualifying Round
Brackley Town 1 Buxton 3
Att: 306

3rd Qualifying Round
Buxton 1 AFC Telford 1
Att: 836

4th Qualifying Round
AFC Telford 2 Buxton 2 (Buxton won on pens)
Match report from Greg Foulger's Dad.
Att: 1,122

5th Qualifying Round
Fleetwood Town 2 Buxton 1
Att: 1,181

1st Round Proper
Fleetwood Town 1 Walsall 1
Att: 2,319

1st Round Replay
Walsall 2 Fleetwood Town 0
Att: 2,056

2nd Round
Torquay 1 Walsall 0
Att: 2,334

3rd Round
Torquay United 1 Carlisle United 0
Att: 3,005

4th Round
Torquay United 0 Crawley Town 1
Att: 5,065

5th Round
Manchester United 1 Crawley Town 0
Att: 74,778

6th Round
Manchester United 2 Arsenal 0
Att: 74,693

Semi-Final (Wembley)
Manchester United 0 Manchester City 1
Att: 86,549

Final (Wembley)
Manchester City 1 Stoke City 0
Att: 88,643

Look out for what will probably be the first post of the 2011/12 season when we pick our first Road to Wembley team.

MUFC banner

Manchester United fans attempting to ensure maximum enjoyment is wrung out of the club's record-breaking 19th title took their cause to Anfield on Sunday, unveiling a banner inside the ground before the Reds' game against Spurs.

United clinched their landmark 19th title on Saturday, finally eclipsing Liverpool's total of 18, and the club's supporters went to great lengths to ensure those at Anfield were fully aware of that fact.

As Liverpool fans began their customary chorus of You'll Never Walk Alone, United fans, organised by the Red Issue fanzine, unveiled a banner emblazoned with the words "MUFC 19 TIMES" in the Anfield Road End of the ground.

Those responsible had a getaway car waiting outside the ground, plus fellow conspirators in the adjoining stand in order to get photographic evidence.

The banner-baiting between the clubs has a long history, with Liverpool fans' now famous "Come Back When You Have Won 18" banner kicking things off in 1994. United fans responded to that after clinching their 18th title in 2008-09 and have now added another chapter to the ongoing rivalry.

Hammered

I have too many West Ham mates to be cock-a-hoop about the Hammers' relegation yesterday although the light aircraft that flew over Wigan's ground just after their equaliser you have to admit was funny and cruelly timed.

The Hammers have knocked on the relegation trapdoor a few times since they got promotion under Alan Pardew in 2005, but for me this season the writing was on the wall. It is said that new owners Messrs Gold and Sullivan budgeted for relegation. Well they pretty much confirmed those expectations by then appointing Avram Grant. Yesterday at the final whistle the porn brothers showed their class by sacking Grant as he walked down the tunnel after seeing his players throw away a 2-goal lead.

I wouldn't trust Gold and Sullivan in appointing the right manager, but whoever it is is, and the Wally with the Brolly is the early favourite, he will spend most of the summer fighting of agents and attempting to put together a team capable of instant promotion.

There is plenty of evidence that says the more established the relegated Premiership team the harder it is to bounce back. By established I mean big wages, a huge infrastructure and inflated egos. Middlesbrough, Coventry, Southampton Leeds, Forest and Charlton are all sad recent examples, yet Chris Hughton did buck the trend and would I reckon be a good appointment

West Ham have the 8th largest payroll in the Premiership and are £80m in debt with the move to the Olympic Stadium looming. If a quick promotion is not achieved then their marketing department will be working overtime to dream up ideas of how they will fill the Olympic Stadium against Doncaster Rovers of a damp Tuesday night.

Sad days for our friends in East London.

Photograph of the week

What the fcuk is going on up in Scotland? Neil Lennon has been attacked in the street, had envelopes with bullets sent to him and parcel bombs adddressed to him. Now he is attacked whilst in his workplace at Hearts last week by some brainless sweaty.

What is with this sectarian bollocks? Sometimes I think that Scotland, and what it's got to do with them I'll never know, is worse than bloody Belfast. If the Irish can learn to live together so can the sweaties from the west of Scotland surely?

Road to Wembley - FA Cup Final day

My first FA Cup Final was 1973. It was a fantastic match full of shocks and emotion and I was hooked on this national treasure. When my brother and I were kids we would be up with Noel Edmonds and sit glued to the telly in our adopted team's colours with home made banners and watch the winners added to future pub quiz history before reenacting the game afterwards in the garden. One year the television blew up the night before, my Dad said he had never seen so many tears.

In later life my brother and I would sit with mates and drink beers and watch the end of season finale. I used to be able to name every finalist all the way back to 1973.

When I lived in Chicago I would get to the pub for breakfast. One year I was astonished to see so many Millwall fans creep out of the woodwork, but they soon disappeared back to their caves. Another year I watched in awe as Steven Gerrard singularly broke West Ham's hearts.

Then a couple of years back the game clashed with some other things in my Bermuda life and I decided long after Man Utd did to turn my back on the Cup after 35 years. I simply had something better to do. I couldn't even tell you who was in last year's final without Googling it, such was my non-interest, which writing this now actually shames me if I'm honest.

But this year I will be back in front of the television again, I might even make a banner. Despite the City billionaires, a Man City v Stoke City Final has a real 1970's vintage feel to it and I think the game is too close to call.

My ex-wife's family are from the Potteries, but despite this I will still be cheering on Stoke.

Bloody blogger

So Blogger wiped about 6 articles that I wrote at the end of last week. Thanks very much you tossers.

Blogger owners Google blamed data corruption for the downtime, which was around 24 hours. Bastards and one of the reasons why I moved my own blog to Word Press last summer.

Appointments

Another N&R FL manager that has found a new workplace is Kirsty Baillie, who has joined Miller from Willis Re.

We are thinking that Willis' office is a lot quieter but Miller's has suddenly got noisier!

Good luck Kirsty.

Appointments

To Steve Black who I've known since my time in Chicago and who has been a N&R FL manager for a number of years starts a new job at Maiden Specialty in Atlanta on May 16th.

Good luck Steve.