Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Good kisser

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 32 Table
New leaders in the Young Un's with Frank & Beans being replaced after 8 weeks by Kirsty's Glasgow kiss. They lead by 6 points as we enter the last week of qualifying. Way back in 3rd is Aston Globetrotters with Tanus Terriers 4th.

Student Ninjas swap places with FFC 4Ever and lower down Morgans Machines edges Factastic Fancies out of promotion contention and Steve leads Sarah by 12.

The question remains if Sarah can push herself back in the top 13 and can Savlyuchenko Spurs, Bingo or Real SocialbleLad join them?

Vodka's tonic

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 32 Table
A new leader as we enter the last week of the qualifying leagues. Vodka Hooligan takes the lead of Lamb to the slaughter with Loads of Roubles into second. Otherwise the nexyt 10 managers remain the same.

Will St George's Rovers, Goonersmoan or Goliath's Big Brother make the cut? We will find out next week.

Student Ninja do their homework

Breaking news8888888Week 32 scores
Chris Wright the Student Ninja slouched into top spot in week 32 with a covert 48 points keeping him nicely tucked into the promotion set. It was Chris' first MoW fiver of the season. Looking threatening in 2nd spot was last year's N&R FL Champions Gooner win league with 46, then Mark's addled Vodka Hooigan with 41.

On 40 was the equally worse for wear Guinness & eggs followed by Harry Houdini, Old Bodeanians, Boys on tour and Nancy Lollygaggers all on 38.

Title challenger Glasgow kiss scored 37 alongside Ben's Special Ones, then Pure Irish slipped in with a cheeky 36 before 35 was the trend amongst Soozie-Sooz Sizzlers, Hannoi Utd and To Elland Back.

Other scores of note were Savlyuchenko Spurs (34), Lovejoy (32), Turtles Breath (29), Torres Rosso (29), Frank & Beans (29), Killer Kilpo (26), Not a chance (26), W Wallace Boys (26), Viking Ginger (15) and with the week's worst score Factastic Fancies on 6.

Monday, March 29, 2010

What's in a team name

No.6 James Ashworth - Jimmy 5 Bellies
James Ashworth is enjoying his first N&R FL season. Previously at AIG, where it is rumoured even Maurice Hank Greenberg dabbled in fantasy football (he even helped one of Francey's ailing sides one year), James moved onto Aon Benfield for not only a lofty salary but also the chance to avoid people knocking at his house late at night and daubing paint over his front door.

The only drawbacks from working at Aon Benfield though is that you have to go to The Magpie every night with Rutts and drink 10 pints of Fosters. Some, namely Nobby & Ready would not actually consider this a drawback.

Anyway since joining Aon Benfield, it came to almost everyones attention that James put quite a bit of weight on (see above) but it wasn't only the beer for James also has a healthy appetite, one that he obviously could not afford whilst working at AIG.

His ex-colleagues at AIG had a sweep stake going from when he first started at Aon in July 2009 until Christmas on how many pounds he put on and it is fair to say that no one even got near to the number but Francey was the closest with 70lbs.

James has agreed (well he hasn't actually) now not to drink again and eat just lettuce until the N&R FL end of season cocktail party in the summer.

N&R Cup 2nd Round Results

Week 32 was Fantasy Cup week. Over to James Alexander Gordon:

Ryan Saveall 34-19 Lee Baughan
Aaron Barden 29-13 Glenn Francis
Kisrty Baillie 37-38 Megan McLeod
Richard Nathan
29-27 Jason Syrett
Martin Singleton 29-26 Mark Dewberry
Hilary Flynn 36-26 Stuart Kilpatrick
Sarah Sheron 6-27 Ian France
Dan Martin 11-35 Keith Read
Rob Munden 35-26 Barry Paull
Ben Guarino 37-29 Feldbruegge/Malloy
Barry Plummer 32-32 Alex Boswell**
Leigh Langton 23-34 Mark Wenman
Soozie Syrett
35-33 John McGowan
Huw Thomas 24-46 Neil Reynolds
Michael Stout 28-26 Neville White
Scott Morgan 29-29 Danny Rose**

** Replays to take place over Week 33.

Wow what a weekend of N&R Cup action. Huge surprises like Megan McLeod beating Kirsty Baillie by just one point, Aaron Barden defeating Glenn Francis, Ben Guarino knocking out last year's runners up Feldbruegge & Malloy and Soozie Syrett just pipping John McGowan by 2 points.

Two games were drawn for the first time so Barry Plummer and Alex Boswell plus Scott Morgan and Danny Rose will play-off again next week for a place in Round 3.

Elsewhere Ryan Saveall beat Sweaty, Martin Singleton kept his silverware dream alive by knocking over Mark Dewberry by just 3 points and in another close match Razor Nathan was as sharp as a knife beating Jason Syrett.

Hilary Flynn beat league struggler Stuart Kilpatrick, Francey had a big win at Sarah Sheron's, Ready defeated Dan Martin and Rob Munden moved into the last 16 with a victory over Barry Paull.

In another game settled by a point Wenners beat Leigh Langton, bald as a coot Michael Stout avoided the Samson effect and beat Neville White and finally last year's winner Neil Reynolds beatour Aussie based manager Huw Thomas.

The draw for the N&R Cup 3rd Round to be made soon.

Player Assists

We have had a request from one of our managers (normally we ignore these unless they involve a hand shandy or a beer or both). However we have been asked to list or detail the Player Assists table. Of course BS (before Sky) these sort of things never existed but anyway, your wish is our command. Here you go:

Player........Club....No. of Assists
Cesc Fábregas Arsenal 13
Frank Lampard Chelsea 12
James Milner Aston Villa 11
Ryan Giggs Manchester United 8
Aaron Lennon Tottenham Hotspur 8
Kevin Davies Bolton Wanderers 7
Matthew Etherington Stoke City 7
Gareth Barry Manchester City 7
Craig Bellamy Manchester City 7
Didier Drogba Chelsea 7
Robin Van Persie Arsenal 7
Ashley Young Aston Villa 7
Antonio Valencia Manchester United 7
Shaun Wright-Phillips Manchester City 6
Andy Reid Sunderland 6
Peter Crouch Tottenham Hotspur 6
Steven Gerrard Liverpool 6
Florent Malouda Chelsea 6
Nicolas Anelka Chelsea 6
Leighton Baines Everton 6
Charles N'Zogbia Wigan Athletic 6
Nani Manchester United 6
Steed Malbranque Sunderland 5
Niko Kranjcar Tottenham Hotspur 5
Eduardo Arsenal 5
Carlos Tevez Manchester City 5
Cristian Benitez Birmingham 5
Up to and including March 28th.

Ready's Benfleet Bet - 5th Round update

Big movers were Aaron Barden back in the hunt with an impressive 16 points matched by Ben Guarino to surge to the top. Kirsty matched this score with Doyley getting 15 but Kennett wooped everyone with a magnificent 23. Ready did pathetically again with a miserly 2 pts.

Predictions table after the 5th Round table:
1. Ben Guarino 75
2= Bingo 74
2= Dewberry 74
4. Plummer 70
5. Neville White 67
6. Barry Paull 66
7= Aaron Barden 64
7= Jason Syrett 64
9. Huw Thomas 62
10. John McGowan 61
11= Sarah Sheron 60
11= Kirsty Baillie 60
13= Mono 59
13= Danny Rose 59
13= Doyley 59
16. Ian France 56
17. Nobby 53
18= Oakley 52
18= Kennett 52
20= Ben Graves 51
20= Neil Reynolds 51
22. Foulger 47
23. Wenman 44
24. Paul Long 42
25. Ready 40
26= Steve Black 38
26= Rob Saxon 38
26= Godders 38
29. Munden 37
30. Rutter 33
31. Waterman 30
32. Kelleher 16


The Quarter Final results to follow.

Photograph of the week

They placed an extra row of advertising boards a couple of yards back from the touchline, presumably to disrupt Rory Delap's run-up. A clever idea – if a rather sneaky one – it didn’t seem to make much of a difference as Delap still managed to reach the penalty box several times and perhaps West Ham should have spent more time worrying about their own throw-ins: when a misplaced one from Julien Faubert handed Stoke possession, Ricardo Fuller pounced to score a desperate winner for all West Ham fans.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Ready's Benfleet Bet update

We have the updated Predictions Table from the FA Cup. This is how it stood after the 4th Round:

1. Simon Ward 66
2= Barry Plummer 63
2= Neville White 63
4. Jason Syrett 62
5= Mark Dewberry 61
5= Barry Paull 61
7= Ben Guarino 59
7= Ian Monohan 59
9= Ian France 52
9= Sarah Sheron 52
9= Danny Rose 52
12= Ben Graves 51
12= John McGowan 51
14. Neil Reynolds 49
15= Aaron Barden 48
15= Huw Thomas 48
17. Alan Oakley 47
18. Nobby 45
19= Mark Wenman 44
19= Kirsty Ballie 44
19= Peter Doyle 44
22. Greg Foulger 40
23= Paul Long 39
23= Peter Goddfrey 39
25= Ready 38
25= Rob Saxon 38
27. Steve Black 34
28. Rutter 33
29= Chris Waterman 30
29= Rob Munden 30
31. Ian Kennett 29
32. Kelleher 16

The main moves in the 4th round were Bingo rocketing into contention with a score of 33 which matched his 3rd round predictions but with half the number of games. This included predicting the Cardiff v Leicester game correctly at 4-2 for a massive 10 points. Ready's score was useless with just 7 points. 5th Round to follow soon.

European tour

I normally ignore the European games until the Quarter Finals, I can't keep up with all those group games and when I have Stockport at home and Colchester away to occupy me, why would I pay any interest to Milan, United, Barca and PSG?

Anyway let's have a little look at who are left in the Champions League then. No Chelsea *holds hand over mouth to cover smirk* Oh dear Roman, money can't buy you love or the Champions League trophy so it seems.

The Special One was muted in his celebrations, which is always nice to see, but over two legs Inter were worthy winners and one has to wonder where the Blues go now with an ageing squad, a massive wageroll and a youth academy that hasn't produced a player of note since the Russian took over and spent a fortune on 140 acres at Cobham, not forgetting Frank Arneson, the supposed guru of youth football.

Two English sides are in the last 8 and avoided each other in the draw. United who's defeat of Milan had experts announcing the death of Serie A before Mourinho stepped in, play old adverseries and Bundesliga leaders Bayern but Arsenal have the toughest draw against favourites Barcelona, who have been in fearsome form. Will Thierry celebrate when he handballs the winner into the net?

The French will be disappointed that Bordeaux and Lyon were drawn together whilst Inter take on surprises CSKA Moscow, who did win European silverware with their Uefa Cup victory in 2005.

The last 8 of the Europa League contains Fulham, a club (sorry Steve) I have hated since Mohamed Al-Fayed pranced in with his green plastic bag in 1997, although to his credit he has stayed the course unlike some of his peers. Despite my personal feelings like everyone else I was in awe of Roy Hodgson and the Fulham team that took apart the mighty Juventus last week and they now play German champions (although struggling this season) Vfl Wolfsburg from the north of the country and incidentially 100% owned by Volkswagen.

Fellow Germans Hamburg play Standard Leige, Valencia play Atletico in an all La Liga tie whilst Liverpool interupt their relegation battle to take on Benfica.

Photograph of the week

Did you see Messi's hat trick the other night? Unbelievable, the bloke is a ledge.

Announcements

Peter Godfrey and Danny Rose after almost 10 years apart have been re-united again under the umbrella of a brand new London underwriting agency called JRP (that is not Pete and Danny in the photo by the way). The old romantic in me and Ready are made up at this news and we can tell you hot of the press that Hello Magazine plan to run a summer photo spread of the back-together-couple.

Godders and Danny will be writing a UK/Eire Commercial Property Book and will hopefully soon start running the annual excursions down to Maidstone Cricket Week, simply the most successful thing they ever did when they were last involved together at Avon. Although I would have thought that the cost of dustcaps did erode the bottom line a bit!

JRP are based in Lloyds on Gallery 4. If you can't find the happy couple look for the keg of Becks, a wonderful marketing trick to bring brokers to the box. The very best of luck to the happy couple who will also be brought back together in the N&R Team Challenge Trophy, which they have won previously.

Champions League & Europa League

Just a reminder that after week 33 the top 13 from the Oldies and the Young Un's will qualify for the N&R Champions League, with the remainder going into the N&R Europa League.

End of season prize money will be announced shortly but cash prizes will be available for the top 12 in the N&R CL and the top 4 in the N&R EL plus two penultimate placed prizes.

Top 9 up?

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 31 Table
Two weeks to go and I would say the top 9 look promoted:
Frank & Beans
Glasgow Kiss
Aston Globetrotters
Tanus Terriers
Gooner Win League
Boys on Tour
FFC 4 Ever
Student Ninjas
Mexican Banana Split


Below them the next three all need to keep a careful watch over their shoulders:
Harry Houdini
Bens "Special Ones"
W Wallace boys


Particularly the horribly out of form Yougoslavian. Then I would say Factastic Fancies and Morgans Machines will fight it out for the 13th place, although Sarah has been custodian of a promotion place for 7 weeks.

With an outside chance are of making the N&R Champions League are:
Savlyuchenko Spurs
Bingo FC
Real Sociable Lad
The Toothless Hogget


For the remainder it is the N&R Europa League but then again two super weeks and it can all change.

9 more?

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 31 Table
Likewise in the Oldies, I would guess that the top 9 are also clear:
Lamb to the Slaughter
Vodka Hooligan
Loads of Roubles
Hannoi Utd
Guiness & Eggs
Old Bodeanians
In Tatters
Paris Eagles
Godders@mobileemail.vodafone.net


Below them the next four have all been in and out of the promotion places:
Gunner Bag It
To Elland Back
Bermuda Addicks
Arsene Knows


But they hold the cards. However the next 5 teams are all within reach and have a more than decent chance of qualifying for the N&R Champions League:
St George's Rovers
Goonersmoan
Goliath's Big Brother
Blue flag up your arse
The No Hopers

As rank outsiders I would consider the following with slim chances of promotion as both are on good form:
Megan and Hannah's Teddy Bears
One Night in Paris


The remaining 10 teams are almost certainly consigned to the N&R Europa League.

Brotherly love

Breaking news8888888Week 31 scores
Well bugger me, Ian Kennett has gone roughly 7 years without winning so much as a bean, and for no apparent reason that I can fathom his Goliath's Big Brother mob has won week 31's MoW. How an earth?

Ian swept to the weekly prize by scoring 76 points, easily a season's best and it gives the Folkestone Red a good outside chance of claiming a promotion berth. Next up in week 31 was the newly bald No Hopers. Michael too is making a late claim for promotion. The 3rd best was Alex's Megan and Hannah's Teddy Bears with 65 and as if to prove it was 'one of those weeks' Rob's To Elland Back also surged to a season-best with the same score as Alex.

Student Ninjas hit 60 and 2Infinity & beyond 55, as the best scores were spread out this week. A hat tricks of 53's for Glasgow Kiss, Bingo FC and FFC 4 Ever (not a bad week for any Fulham fan). 51 for every women's fantasy threesome Bermuda Addick and That's not you (that probably reads wrong, but my delete button is not working) and a half century for our old colleague Ginger Rabbit and his Vikings.

It was an odd week with only Kirsty's Glasgow kiss from the higher echelons of the overall table featuring amongst the top weekly scorers. John's Load of Roubles did knock in a decent 49 and then came Mono's Blue flag up your arse with 46 and Turtles Breath, Harry Houdini, Vodka Hooligan and Pure Irish all on 45. Happy Paddy's Day Hills.

Featured scoring this week was Hannoi Utd 42, Frank & Beans 41, Tanus Terriers 36, Gooner win league 28 and last up Jimmy 5 Bellies who scored 17.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Iain Dowie Presents: 'Turning around the Tigers'

You have to give it to the bloke and no one should stand in the way of a bloke being able to earn a crust but that must be some motivational speach that he lure's football league chairmen with.

Maybe Adam Pearson chose Dowie because he pioneered the headset look, although I am not sure Phil Brown's weekly sunbed appointment will do much to his looks. Of course Dowie's powerpoint presentation has become legend in football. 'Advancing the Addicks' I am led to believe still sits in Richard Murray's bottom drawer.

Dowie has 9 games to keep Hull up including matches against relegation rivals Portsmouth (although they are effectively down), Burnley, Sunderland and Wigan. They end the season at home to Liverpool, who one would assume will be fighting for a Champions League/Europa Cup place.

Sadly the fact remains however that Charlton are playing third tier football and Iain Dowie is managing a Premiership team with an apparent carrot of a £1m waiting if he can overcome Mick McCarthy and Brian Laws. Eminently do-able I would say.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

N&R Cup 2nd Round

These ties will be played over this weekend (week 32). Manager with the most weekly points wins, a draw will result in a replay.

This is the draw made at N&R HQ lunchtime:

Ryan Saveall v Lee Baughan
Aaron Barden v Glenn Francis
Kisrty Baillie v Megan McLeod
Richard Nathan v Jason Syrett
Martin Singleton v Mark Dewberry
Hilary Flynn v Stuart Kilpatrick
Sarah Sheron v Ian France
Dan Martin v Keith Read
Rob Munden v Barry Paull
Ben Guarino v Feldbruegge/Malloy
Barry Plummer v Alex Boswell
Leigh Langton v Mark Wenman
Soozie Syrett v John McGowan
Huw Thomas v Neil Reynolds
Michael Stout v Neville White
Scott Morgan v Danny Rose

Holder Neil Reynolds takes on Huw Thomas, league leaders Tim and Dennis play Ben Guarino, in an all girl contest Megan plays Kirsty and in ties of the round Soozie plays Johnny Mc and Barry P meets Rob Munden. The 16 winners will go into the 3rd Round.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Easy over for Steve

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 30 Table
The table is still led by Lamb to the slaughter but Guinness & eggs made the biggest splash in week 30. Steve rose to 6th but Paris Eagles after a shocking week 30 score slip to 7th.

Below the promotion race both Goonersmoan and One night in Paris move in the right direction as further down did MoW Californication.

Bottom remains Paul's Brighton Blues.

The Special One Inter's the race

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 30 Table
The Chicago boys Frank & Beans still lead with Glasgow kiss heading the pack consisting of Aston Glogetrotters, Tanus Terriers and Gooner win league.

Boys on tour are 6th and up to 7th is Mexican Banana Split. Ben Guarino's Special Ones finally showing some form that inspired one of Francey's duff sides previously move up to 11th.

Bottom remains Atlanta based Cesc and the city.

Team Challenge - What you talkin' about Willis?

Only once has the N&R Team Challenge been retained and that was by Marsh in the mid-noughties. Willis are the current champions and now lead by 5 points Bluefin in the race for the team trophy.

Willis' team led by Ian Kennett with cheerleaders Kirsty and Sarah flapping their pom pom's in support have broken the 1,000 point barrier and are looking good for retaining the trophy (yes girls there will be a new trophy). In second and breathing down Willis' necks are Ready & Sav and Bluefin. Both have won the N&R title before and will be used to the pressure as we enter the final part of the season.

In 3rd is the huge team from Aon Benfield with no less than four managers in the overall top 10, which is a remarkable acheivement yet a couple of stragglers are holding the team back from dominance. In 4th is the joint Mexican/Maidstone effort from RSA.

5th is Aon's International team comprising Bermuda, Chicago, Serbia and Australia. In fact it is our friend downunder holding us back at the mo. 6th place is QBE and the threesome of Wrighty, Wardy and Saxon.

Down in 7th Henry leads Chartis' challenge this year but despite a name change too many slackers mean that it will be another year probably before the famous trophy gets to sit on Francey's desk. Mono and Neville and Tokio are next up with the wooden spoon currently belonging to Lloyds. This despite their ranks being added to by Godders entrance to the famous building. Edward Lloyd will be turning in his grave....

Water works

Breaking news8888888Week 30 scores
Chris Waterman last seen swinging his pants in Mango's in South Beach ran away with week 30 collecting MoW and Californication took a little spurt up the league table too.

3 points behind Chris was Morgan's Machines on 43. Guinness & Eggs scrambled in on 42 while Cesc and the city and Lovejoy's hugged both managed a 41. Old Bodeanians continued a rich vein of form with 39, a point more than Gooner Win League and Egg chasing is best.

36 was about as good as it got for Bens Special Ones and Martin's Turtles Breath and Rochdale Allstars whalloped a 35.

Other noteworthy scores were by Boys on tour (30), Bingo (28), Brighton Blues (23), Not a chance (20) and Blue flag up your arse (15).

4 manager's scores were under 10 in week 30. Adelaide Taffs made an 8, Keep the Faith
7, Goliath's Big Brother 4 and last and certainly least Paris Eagles with 2.

Phil Brown

Gutted. One of the N&R FL Blog's most popular Premier League managers today had his sun bed turned off and was put on 'gardening leave.' Gardening leave in Mallorca might allow old Perma Phil to top up his tan, but Humberside....

Phil Brown who took over from Hull when they were 3rd from bottom of the Championship from a complete c0ck called Phil Parkinson, kept them up and then the next season got Hull promoted to the top tier for the first time in 104 years in 2008.

Then after an incredible start to last season, the Tigers avoided relegation on the last day as Newcastle went down instead. This season Hull are fighting it out at the bottom with Pompey, Burnley, Bolton, Wolves, Wigan and West Ham but the Hull board couldn't wait and made the decision to replace Brown this morning.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Landon Donovan

I have not always been very polite when it came to Landon Donovan. I questioned his ambition and his ability. His previous turns at playing in Europe were frankly a disaster. He was happy to lord it in the MLS with a good wage and a great life in LA. A big fish in a small footballing pond.

However I have changed my opinion after his 10-week spell with Everton when after his final game at home to Hull last week he was given a heroes send-off. The U.S. international's (he has about 300 caps or something) arrival coincided with just two league defeats and shock wins over Chelsea and champions Manchester United and he left the club in ninth place in the table

"The send-off from the fans after the Hull City game was one of the most incredible experiences of my life..." he said.

"I was talking to my dad and I was saying that I wished he could have been here against Hull City, just to see the reception after the game, because it was something I've never experienced and I'm not sure I ever will again."

Well Landy me old china. Real football, real passion and a league in which you and your pace and intelligence can excel at. Come back soon.

David Beckham

He may not have played in South Africa, he may not have even gone (of course he was going) but David Beckham tearing his achilles tendon today will almost definitely count him out of this year's World Cup. Like a lot of Englishmen Beckham inordinately grew on me and there were England games when he literally won them on his own, read Wayne Rooney now.

Yeh, yeh he can't head the ball, he can't tackle and his left leg is for standing on but ignoring his other peg, his experience, personality and positive presence in the team camp would have been invaluable in what would have been his 4th World Cup and he must be devastated. I am.

His chances of resuming his career appear slim tonight, yet alone being fit for South Africa in 3 months time but I always thought, and this terrible news made me think it again tonight, that if I ever got picked for England (any sport) then I wanted to stand there and bellow out the national anthem and be as proud as David Beckham is to play for his country.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Michael Stout - St Baldricks

N&R FL manager Michael Stout is shaving his hair off tomorrow at 4.15pm in Fado, Chicago for St Baldricks. Michael said: "You heard it right - I'm shaving my head in solidarity with children who have cancer and typically lose their hair during treatment, while raising critical funds for childhood cancer research!"

Please visit his donor page and donate here: http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/participantid/394227

Photo taken beforehand!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Road to Wembley - all square

N&R's Road to Wembley side Fulham and Spurs must do battle again for a place at Wembley in the FA Cup semi-final after a deadlock at Craven Cottage.

Roy Hodgson's side, seeking to secure their first Wembley appearance since they lost to West Ham United in the 1975 FA Cup final, created the better opportunities of a tightly-contested encounter short on clear-cut openings.

Spurs keeper Heurelho Gomes ensured they survived to earn a replay at White Hart Lane with a faultless display that included outstanding saves from Zoltan Gera and Damien Duff in the second half.

Fulham were rarely troubled at the back, although keeper Mark Schwarzer was tested by Niko Kranjcar's shot and Peter Crouch's header before the break.

Spurs boss Harry Redknapp will be the happier manager after securing home advantage with this draw, but Hodgson has fashioned a talented side at Fulham and will also go into next week's the replay with real optimism.

Monday, March 08, 2010

A reason not to slide tackle indoors

A terrible story, particularly to anyone who has played indoor football:

Robson Rocha Costa dies playing indoor football.

Saturday, March 06, 2010

Photograph of the week

Pompey despite their problems and certain relegation moved into the FA Cup semi-finals and a game at Wembley plus a healthy payday after beating Birmingham thanks to two Piquionne goals. Mind you on the day when the International Football Association Board decided against all goal line technology experiments and to rely on referees instead referee Bennett disallowed a perfectly good Birmingham goal.

Wembley's pitch

The Wembley pitch will be replaced for the 10th (TEN) time in the next few weeks at a cost of £90,000. It is just 3 years since the stadium opened.

Bad freakish weather and the use of the stadium for non-football events has been blamed but for someone who remembers the lush turf of the old Wembley it saddens me to hear James Milner after the Carling Cup final as "one of the worst pitches I've played on all year." Michael Owen's season-ending hammy has also been put down to the heavy playing surface witnessed during last week's Man U League Cup win over Villa.

A giant pitch cover had to be brought in before the game, I can't believe that this is not part of permanent Wembley kit? Head groundsman Steve Welch, now working for a Midlands lawn care franchise business ironically, was made the scapegoat for the unacceptable state of the ground for the FA Cup semi-finals last year, as was fired but the Wembley policy is to replace the pitch whenever it is felt necessary.

At £90,000 a pop and a fortnight to bed down. The first match on the latest surface will be the Johnstone's Paint Trophy final on March 28 between Carlisle and Southampton.

But surely rain and snow shouldn't be blamed, does anyone not remember club pitches in the 70's and 80's yet the old Wembley surface still resembled a snooker table.

Sandwich

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 29 Table
Glenn's Lamb to the slaughter remain top ahead of Vodka Hooligan. Loads of Roubles are 3rd and Hannoi Utd move stealth-like (if that is possible) into 4th. Nigel's In Tatters gain a couple of places and are sandwiched by the rather stale crusty rye of Paris Eagles and Godders@mobileemail.vodafone.net!

Guinness & eggs are 8th with Oakers Old Bodeanians 9th. Jase's Gunner Bag it have become a staple of the top 13 and Danny's Arsene Knows are back in the hunt after a good week 29.

The top 13 is completed by To Elland Back and Bermuda Addicks with Goonersmoan watching from the sidelines in 14th.

St George's Rovers, Blue flag up your arse, Goliath's Big Brother, One night in Paris and the No Hopers are all still within shouting distance.

Brighton Blues have the embarrassing record of the worst points tally of all 59 teams.

Kiss me quick

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 29 Table
Glasgow kiss
closed the gap on Frank & Beans at the top of the Young Un's table to 22 points. A gap has now opened between Kirsty and Henry's Aston Globetrotters. Tanus Terriers are 4th and Gooner win League 5th but up to 6th are Boys on tour.

7th are FFC 4Ever, just ahead of W Wallace Boys, recovering nicely after half of Davor's team left for the African Nations. Student Ninjas are looking comfy in 9th tied with Mexican Banana Split. Factastic fancies hang nicely in 11th ahead of Harry Houdini and Ben's Special Ones are 13th.

a Slight gap has opened below the promotion pack but with 4 weeks left I think Morgan Machines, Savlyuchenko Spurs, Real Sociable Lad, Toothless Hogget, Soozie-Sooz Sizzlers, Bingo and Torres Rosso all have a chance to win their way into the N&R Champions League.

The others sadly will face the N&R Europa Cup.

N&R Cup 2nd Round

The N&R Cup will resume in week 32. The draw will be made next week at N&R HQ.

These are the managers left in the competition:

Leigh Langton, Soozie Syrett, Richard Nathan, Dan Martin, Huw Thomas, Hilary Flynn, Lee Baughan, Kirsty Baillie, Scott Morgan, Danny Rose, Neil Reynolds, Mark Dewberry, Sarah Sheron, Barry Paull, Megan McLeod, Aaron Bardon, Martin Singleton, Alex Boswell, Feldbruegge/Malloy, Barry Plummer, Keith Read, Ryan Saveall, Jason Syrett, John McGowan, Michael Stout, Stuart Kilpatrick, Neville White, Mark Wenman, Ian France, Glenn Francis, Ben Guarino and Rob Munden.

Look out for the draw.

Friday, March 05, 2010

Raod to Wembley - Fulham meet Spurs

Fulham put pay to Notts County in the FA Cup 5th Round quite convincingly and host Tottenham tomorrow at Craven Cottage.

Notts County's dream really is over now, whose dalliance with fame and mysterious fortunes appears finally to have crumbled in the course of a week that sadly saw more drama off the pitch than they were able to produce on it.

The sale of the club to Ray Trew and then the exit of Sven-Goran Eriksson marked the end of a brief and, for all the hype, disappointing attempt to transform it into an unlikely football superpower. The FA Cup offered another shot at glory and that has now gone as well. All that remains is the less glamorous gruel of League Two, albeit with a decent chance of an escape from it when the season ends.

For the record after 22 minutes Simon Davies made a run inside from the left, Danny Murphy chipped a pass perfectly into his path and Davies shielded the ball from John Thompson before surprising Kasper Schmeichel with an early and perfectly angled shot into the far corner. Then in the 41st minute David Elm prodded a first-time pass to Zamora, who controlled smartly on his chest before scoring with the outside of his left foot.

Their first-half efforts having gone unrewarded, County faded in the second half and offered little more than a succession of not particularly dangerous long-range efforts from Davies. Fulham relaxed and had started the process of replacing their more important players when Damien Duff cut inside Jonnie Jackson and shot through the full-back's legs and past Schmeichel. Five minutes later Stefano Okaka, who had only just replaced Zamora, raced through to add a fourth.

So for the second successive year Fulham have reached the FA Cup quarter-final, though their progress has been aided by a succession of kind draws – when they play Tottenham tomorrow it will be the first time they have been forced to play a side from either of the top two divisions.

Fulham, the oldest professional team in London have only once been in the FA Cup Final, beaten by West Ham in 1975 (I remember it well). They were in the 2nd division then, and to most of our surprise thanks to the hugely under-rated Roy Hodgson they are now considered a Premier League mainstay. Can he take then to the semi-finals for the 2nd ever time. We'll find out tomorrow.

Quiz

Name this place. Clue: Venue of Gay Pride week August 2011.

Tippety Top Tatters

Breaking news8888888Week 29 scores
Nigel's In Tatters walked away with the week 29 MoW award, his first of the season and he pipped Wenmania by a point. 3rd was our Scottish lovely Glasgow Kiss and 5 behind her was Boys on Tour from down Mexico way.

Loads of Roubles, Hannoi Utd and the improving Gianfrancophiles are stashed away a 59, two more than Glenn's Lamb to the slaughter.

2 Infinity & Beyond and Paris Eagles (both in fantasy administration), Vodka Hooligan, who is currently on the naughty step, Gunner Bag It, who are making a slow climb up the table, the very rude Mexican Banana Split, Arsene Knows but cannot see, the sexual Soozie-Sooz Sizzler sausages (hopefully planning her hen for Metropolis), the consistent, nay dull Aston Globetrotters, breakfast special Guiness & Eggs and Jose-esque Bens "Special Ones" all served up 50 plus points.

Other notables were Frank & Beans with 48, Rochdale Allstars 44, Jimmy 5 Bellies 42, St George's Rovers and Brighton Blues both 34, One night in Paris 25, Keep the faith 18 and lastly and leastly Turtles Breath 12.

Week 29 review

McFadden got a rare goal in Birmingham's win over Wigan, Zak Knight gave Owen Coyle just his 2nd win for Bolton at home to Wolves and bloody Burnley let me down on a my football bet by losing to Pompey of all people at home. Brian Laws you are an idiot.

Ryan Shawcross' foul on Aaron Ramsey took the headlines at the Brittania but despite his obvious upset Fabregas got what was the winner in a 3-1 win.

In Saturday's big game Wayne Bridge did not shake John Terry's hand but Tevez et all did their talking on the pitch at City beat Chelsea 4-2 at the Bridge.

On Sunday Spurs beat Everton 2-1, Sunderland could only draw at home to Everton and Torres got Liverpool's winner at Anfield beating Blackburn 2-1.

Wednesday, March 03, 2010

Keith Alexander RIP

Terrible news this morning that Macclesfield manager Keith Alexander died after last night's game at Notts County. He was 53 years old.

In November 2003 Keith collapsed with a double aneurysm, revealing afterwards that he had to be brought back to life three times but since then he had worked at Peterborough, Bury and Macclesfield and was the archetypical lower league player in his day and manager often overlooked by today's fame seeking news and media.

Alexander was one of just two black managers in the whole of the four leagues, which bearing in mind the players in the game is a shocking statistic.

The exact cause of Alexander's death remains unclear, but Rance said: "He went home after the game last night and collapsed. Tragically, he never recovered."

Macclesfield chairman Mike Rance said: "Keith was the perfect manager for a club like ours. He was totally pragmatic about managing in League Two and the constraints involved. He was a splendid man, a real gentleman and an absolute privilege to work with. He was strong, sensible, commanded respect throughout the game and was unique in many ways."
Peterborough director of sport Barry Fry, who worked with Alexander when he was a player at Barnet and also at London Road when he was a manager, added: "I really can't believe it. I'd been worried lately about his health but he assured me he was fine. "He recently had a bout of hiccups that he couldn't get rid of and he went into hospital for that, but he wasn't feeling ill when I spoke to him last, he was bubbly.

"He'd had a few days off but he couldn't wait to get back on the training pitch. "You won't find a more dedicated man at any club, he always gave 150%. I feel so sad for his family."


Football League chairman Lord Mawhinney said: "I am shocked and deeply saddened by the death of Keith Alexander. The thoughts of the Football League, its clubs and football supporters everywhere will be with Keith's family and friends.

"He was a tough, dogged competitor as a player and as a manager and will be greatly missed."

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Photograph of the week

It would have been so much cooler from Wayne Bridge if he had gone to shake Terry's hand and then put it up to his nose wouldn't have it?

Week 28 review

Wednesday 17th Feb
A bore draw between Wigan and Bolton but a boon for fantasy defenders.

Saturday 20th Feb
Bendtner and Fabregas get Arsenal's goals over Sunderland, Bilyaletdinov and youngsters Gosling and Rodwell shock Man U in the 3-1 victory for Everton, Diao gets a very late winner for Stoke over buggered Pompey, Drogba get's both Chelsea's goals at Woves and Hammers hammer Hull 3-0.

Sunday 21st Feb
On form Pavlyuchenko gets two for Spurs in a 3-0 win at Wigan, Zamora scores Fulham's winner at home to Birmingham, Kalinic gets another goal for Blackburn as they beat rivals Bolton. Roberts and Givet also score and Man City and Liverpool draw 0-0.

Seven goals at Villa Park but five are for Villa as they stuff Burnley despite going a goal down.

Tuesday 23rd Feb
Man U or should we say Wayne Rooney beat West Ham. Little Micky Owen did score too though.

Moan, moan, moan

Breaking news8888888Week 28 scores
Bugger me. Rutts has won a MoW award, a fiver, enough for a pint and a half of Fosters. Top man. Goonersmoan swept to the best weekly score in week 26 with 63 points, a couple more than greedy Vodka Hooligan, who have already won 3 MoW's this season. W Wallace Boys bounced back with a 52, and the trio of Gunner Bag It, Loads of Roubles and Soozie-Sooz Sizzlers all hit a half century.

Torres Rosso back from the darkness scored 46, Guinness & eggs 45, To Elland Back 45, Gooner win league and bottom team Cesc and the city 44 - James' best score for ages.

Notable week 26 scores were 38 from both title challengers Tanus Terriers and In Tatters, a decent 35 from Turtles Breath, 26 each from Egg chasing is best, Killer Kilpo and Hill's Pure Irish and 24 from Wenmania (if anyone has Wenners home email address please send, ta.)

Worst weekly score of 11 went to Paul's Brighton Blues and Ben's Gianfrancophiles, who frankly should know better!

Arsene not knowing

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 28 Table
Vodka Hooligan
opened a slight lead in week 28 on Loads of Roubles. Old Bodeanians move up the pack, as does Gunner Bag it and To Elland Back. Bermuda Addicks slips and dear old Goonersmoan appear on the promotion scene in Week 26 for the first time. This at the expense of Danny's Arsene Knows, who were having a good spell before Christmas.

St George's Rovers, Blue flag up your arse, One Night in Paris, Goliath's Big Brother, The No Hopers and Keep the Faith are er, keeping the faith in the chasing ward.

Bottom still are Mutley's Brighton Blues.

Wallace boys back in town

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 28 Table
With Frank & Beans still out in front the top four are looking good for promotion even with 5 weeks still to play.

W Wallace Boys for no reason at all after slipping away are now back in the big time, up to 6th from 9th in week 28. After a stunning few weeks Factastic Fancies take a breather down in 11th.

Below the top 13 Soozie-Sooz Sizzlers make up some ground but Cesc and the city remain anchored to the bottom.

Monday, March 01, 2010

Week 27 review

Another busy calendar of weekly games. Firstly in the Premiership:

Wednesday 10th February
Arsenal bounce back with Diaby's goal at home to Liverpool in a big midweek programme. At Villa Park United's title challenge has the breaks pressed down by Villa as they hold the Champions 1-1. Balckburn beat Hull 1-0 thanks to an own goal by in form keeper Myhill.

Chelsea come unglued by the Toffeemen at Goodison 2-1, thanks to two from Saha and the Hammers have a much needed win over Birmingham 2-0 and suprisingly Wolves beat Spurs 1-0.

Tuesday 16th Feburary
Stoke and Man City share the spoils 1-1.

FA Cup 5th Round

Games involving Premier League teams saw Tottenham get a replay at Bolton. Davies and Defoe the scorers. Petrov and Collins were Villa's scorers at Selhurst in a 2-2 draw. Davies, Zamora, Duff and the wonderfully named Okaka Chuka helped Fulham overcome League Two and basket case Notts County.

Drogba, Ballack, Sturridge and Kalou were Chelski's scorers in their comfortable win over Cardiff. Ridgewell got a another late winner for Birmingham at Derby to see the Blues through.

Man City and Stoke drew whilst Pompey overcame all of their problems to stuff rivals Southampton at St Marys. Owusu-Abeyie, Dindane, Belhadj and O'Hara all became heroes in Portsmouth households, at least for a weekend!

Do the Yanks have what it takes?

Breaking news8888888Week 27 scores
Amazingly it took 27 weeks but Frank & Beans won their first MoW of the season, and in the process cemented their lead at the top of the Young Un's table and in the overall table they moved past the 1,000 point barrier. Last season the American's lacked the final push in the last 3rd of the season, I wonder if this season they have got what it takes to join the honourable list of N&R FL champions?

There is some serious competition from some experienced managers such as Mark Simmons, John McGowan, Barry Paull, Keith Read, Peter Godfrey, Greg Foulger, Paul Kelleher as well as the female intuition of Kirsty Baillie and consistency of Lee Horne, Henry Williams and last season's winner Neil Reynolds.

Back to week 27 and Hannoi Utd kept up their good recent form with 54 points, Guinness & Black scored 52 as did W Wallace Boys (much better from the Serb there). Gunner Bag it made 51, a half century from Loads of Roubles and Factastic Fancies. That is 216 points from Sarah in 3 weeks!

Other fine scoring was from Wenmania (48), Boys on tour and Goonersmoan (46 each), Glasgow Kiss and Jimmy 5 Bellies (45) and much better from Nancy Lollygaggers with 44.

Week 27's worst score was 15 from the Toothless Hogget.

Un-Goddersly

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 27 Table
Vodka Hooligan open up at gap at the summit of the Oldies. Loads of Roubles move into 2nd and Paris Eagles stay 3rd. Ready's Hannoi Utd are well placed in 4th but the big news in week 27 was the collapse of Godders@mobileemail.vodafone.net to 5th.

The table is tightly packed and Lamb to the slaughter slip to 6th with Old Bodeanians in 7th and In Tatters 8th. St George's Rovers drop out of the promotion places to 14th and are replaced again by To Elland Back.

Apart from Razor, Goliath's big brother are still in the mix in 15th as are Goonersmoan, One night in Paris and Blue flag up your arse.

A good outside chance beckons No Hopers, Keep the faith and Megan & Hannah's Teddy Bears and perhaps even Californication.

Brighton Blues remain bottom.

Consistent four-ball

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 27 Table
44 points clear at the top of the Young Un's are Frank & Beans after another fabulous week. Glasgow kiss stay second and Aston Globetrotters remain 3rd and Tanus Terriers 4th. Very consistent work from Tim, Dennis, Kirsty, Henry and Lee.

In 5th ominously are last year's champ Gooner win league with FFC 4Ever in 6th. Factastic Fancies climb a place to 8th, W Wallace finally comes out of their torper and hurdle 4 spots to 9th and Student Ninjas eat a spot to 11th.

Below the promotion places are Morgan's Machines and Savlyuchenko Spurs both still in close combat. A bit further away are Real Sociable Lad, who started the season so well and The Toothless Hogget.

Bottom remain Cesc and the city.

Best weekly score

1. Sarah Sheron. Week 25. 101 points
2. Steve Merchant. Week 20. 96 points
3. Felbruegge/Malloy. Week 25. 95 points
4= Neil Reynolds. Week 25. 91 points
4= Alan Oakley. Week 25. 91 points
6. Sarah Sheron. Week 19. 88 points
7. John McGowan. Week 26. 87 points
8. Alex Byatt. week 25. 86 points
9= Alan Oakley. Week 19. 85 points
9= Nigel Tatlock. Week 25. 85 points
11= Barry Paull. Week 25. 85 points
12= Hilary Flynn. Week 2. 84 points
12= Paul Kelleher. Week 20. 84 points
14= Lee Horne. Week 20. 83 points
14= Lee Baughan. Week 21. 83 points
16. Steve Black. Week 20. 80 points
Scores up to week 26.

Turn up the Mc

Breaking news8888888Week 26 scores
Johnny McGowan is again showing his fantasy prowess, one of our most consistent performers picked up this season's 3rd MoW award in week 26. Load of Roubles' 87 points is the season's 7th best score. Frank & Beans ket up their title challenge with 79 points - can Tim and Dennis take the coveted N&R trophy to the USA for the first time?

Hannoi Utd struck a 78, and a season's best. Factastic Fancies is on an absolute roll. 65 for Sarah and 64 for her colleague Kirsty and Glasgow Kiss (Team Challenge trophy table to follow soon). Mono's Blue flag up your arse had a great week 26 and scored 63, Oldies leader Vodka Hooligan notched 62 and Guinness & eggs 60.

The week's worst scorer's were Megan and Hannah's Teddy Bears and Egg chasing is best with 20 each.

Vodka's tonic

Breaking news8888888The Oldies Latest Week 26 Table
Vodka Hooligan slipped into top spot in week 26, Mark sits 9 points ahead of Godders@mobileemail.vodafone.net and a further 7 ahead of Paris Eagles in 3rd.

In Tatters fell from 5th to 8th and Loads of Roubles moves back to 5th. Hannoi Utd was also a climber as was Guinness & eggs but Goliath's Big Brother dropped out of the promotion spaces and was replaced by Gunner Bag it.

Fancy that

Breaking news8888888The Young Un's Latest Week 26 Table
Frank & Beans came within reach of a 1,000 points but otherwise the top 6 remained unchanged in week 26 but Greg's Boys on tour did overtake Pk's Mexcian Banana Skin and climb into 7th. Factastic Fancies continued their superb climb and are now 9th and Morgan's Machines fell out of contention.

Cesc and the city remain bottom and the lowest N&R FL point scorer.